Count to Three
by OneStarStrong24601
Summary: Cas, an awkward lawyer becomes a mentor for Dean's younger brother, Sam. Dean catches Cas' eye from the very beginning. After a tragic death in the family Dean seeks comfort in his new found friend with some very unconventional methods. Dean battles with his sexuality and Cas finds he's not as cold as he thought. (not in the hunter world, BDSM, First fic, please don't hate me)
1. The Dinner

Castiel sits at the borrowed desk in the Stanford Law School confrence room, where he is about to speak about the stressfulness of the courtroom. Many first years student don't realize that being a lawyer is more than just proving a case. He laughs at himself because he knows he's going to be very awkward, like always. Most of the time Cas feels lonley, but there's no time to dwell on it because the first of the 10 students started to file in.

Halfway through his prepared speech he notices one student who is very engrossed and hanging on to his every word.

"Sam, do you have a question?"

"Yes, how are you supposed to handle somene who you know is lying, but you just can't prove it in court?"

"Good question..."

Cas finishes his mantra and invites the class to dinner, for anyone who has additional questions. About half the class looks interested. Castiel allows them to bring one companion, if they so choose.

"Aw, Dean, C'mon. Please come, this guy is really cool. The dinner's at seven. It won't be too long."

"Jesus, Sammy, I'm not smart enough to go to something like this. This is why I never went to college. I'll just sit there like a tramp in church; awkward."

Sam finally convince Dean to go. He was always excited to bring his big brother to his college things. He wants him to be proud of him, and see how hard he's working. Plus Sam was really interested in what Castiel had to say. He was very socially awkward, but he seemed to have a very specific outlook on things.

Pulling up to the four star restaurant Sam was super excited. Dean looks nervous and uncomfortable. Thinking to ease his mind Sam says, "Look on the bright side, there will be pie." That got him to at least smirk. Finding the table was easy enough because half the class was there with at least one non-student for each atendee. Sam found the last two seats for him and Dean.

"Mr. Novak, this is my older brother Dean." Cas and Dean shook hands.

"Please, call me Cas. Your brother seems to be a very smart and curious student."

"Well, I don't know about smart, but curious definitely." Sam nudged his shoulder and Dean laughed, " I'm joking, yes, my brother is very smart."

Throughout the evening Sam and the other students asked many questions, but Sam couldn't help but notice that Cas kept glancing at Dean steadily all night. One by one students and their company would take their leave. Sam was the last one left. He and Cas were talking back and forth about class oportunities whilst Dean stared off. He had already finished his second plate of apple pie and icecream.

"I love to offer you a position as an intern through my office." Cas says loudly enough to get Dean's attention.

"Oh, that would be amazing!" Sam is beaming.

"Wonderful, I'll out the paperwork through Monday morning. In the mean time check out the article I mentioned." Cas looked over at Dean and said, "I have some paperwork for you as well regarding the internship. I will have those ready by Sunday morning if you'd like to stop by my apartment to pick them up."

Dean looks over at Sam and his excited puppy eyes, "Uhh, yeah, sure." Sam smiled even bigger and that made going to this thing tonight worth it. He was happy as long as Sam was.


	2. Luring a Friend

Sam was extatic when they got home.

"Thank you so much Dean. This means so much to me. Castiel Novak is a renouned lawyer. This is an amazing opportunity for me."

"As long as he's not a creep, and it makes you happy. I know Dad would have wanted you to follow your dream like this." Dean always was stiff when he brought up his father. John Winchester was not a model father, but Sam had only been nine when he died. Bobby, who was like their father had stepped in and assumed that figure when sixteen year old Dean couldn't.

"I'm gonna head to my room. Plus you need a shower. You have pie crust all over your shirt." Dean looked down and laughed. He was cover with crumbs and a bit of the sticky apple filling.

"Goodnight Sammy."

"Night Dean."

/

On sunday morning Dean got up around noon, as was custom for a non-work day. He dressed in his usual dark blue jeans and red flanel with his light leather jacket. No matter how hot it was outside this was his norm for clothes. He looked at his phone and tried to remember where he had put the number to the lawyer. After searching every pocket he finally found it in the inner pocket of the jacket. Dialing the number he gathered his keys and headed towards the only thing his father left him. His baby was a black '67 impala.

"Hello, this is Castiel Novak."

"Hi, uh, this is Dean Winchester. Sam's older brother, I was just making sure that it was ok that I come get the paperwork now."

"Oh, hello, yeah, that's fine. I'll text you the address."

"Alright, Thanks.

Shortly after hanging up Dean got a message from the lawyer. He also noticed that he'd missed a call from Lisa. She handled Dean's artwork. During the weekdays Dean was a construction worker, but he had a hobby he kept secret. Dean was a very talented painter who sold his artwork through Lisa. The message said, _Sold another painting! You're Awesome._

It didn't take too long to get to the very grand apartments the lawyer lived in. He reached the door with 21b on it and knocked. He heard something shuffling around and the door opened.

The first thing he noticed was the large painting hanging directly across from the door. It was one of his. There was a canvas cover on the floor as if he just unwrapped and hung it up.

"Hello, please come in. I'll grab the paperwork." Dean stepped in and waited for the man to go around the corner before he went up to his painting. It was a blue based angel in a circle of black smoke. He'd painted it a couple of months after his father's death.

"I love the symbolism. I would actually like to meet the artist who painted, but the vendor said he was anonymous." Castiel had come back quietly, making Dean jump.

Dean just kinda stares at him in disbelief. He reaches up and takes the outstretched papers.

"Would you like some tea or something while you look through them?"

"Ah, sure. tea is fine."

Dean was lead to a large sofa that felt like sitting on a cloud.

"This couch is my heaven." Cas laughed to himself.

"Very soft." Dean was already looking through the papers. All of them were very simple. Something Sammy could've done himself. Dean was confused. "These are things Sam could've filled out himself. Why did I have to get them?"

Cas came back around the corner looking sheepish. He even had a slight blush on his cheeks.

"Well, truly I just wanted to talk to you. I don't have friends, but I thought we could talk."

"So you basically lured me here for conversation?"

In a full blush now Cas nodded his head.

"Well, I'm already here. You kinda saved me from hell today anyway."

"How did I do that?"

"I would've had to help Ellen garden. If there's one thing I hate more than chick flicks, it's gardening."

The conversation bloomed and Dean left about two hours later. Other than his family, Dean didn't really have friends. It felt nice to talk to someone about nothing imortant. Even if that person had a problem with personal space sometimes.


	3. Ghostbusters

A couple of months went by with Cas' and Dean's awkward encounter budding into a semi-functional friendship. Sam had started his internship and became closer with Castiel as well. Dean still continued to paint in secret, and debated whether he should tell his new friend that he'd bought one of his works. One day Sam came home super excited about something new.

"Sam, what's doing? What's got you all sparkly eyed?" Sam ducked his head walked around Dean to get to the fridge.

"Nothing? I really don't know what you're talking about. You hungry?"

Dean knew that look. Sam had found him some bright eyed lovely. "Saaam. What's her name? C'mon you can't play me." Sam sighed into the fridge and brought the sandwich stuff to the counter.

"Her name is Jessica, and before you ask yes, she's beautiful." Sam was slightly blushing.

"Wow, Sammy, look at you go. You going out with her?" Dean clapped Sam on the shoulder.

"I haven't asked her yet. Don't give me that look, not everyone can have girls fall at their feet becuase of thier smile." Sam glares at his older brother in annoyance.

"Well, Sammy, you are my brother after all. Once you actually grow a set, she'll be falling in your lap." Dean smiled as Sam rolled his eyes. This banter is what Dean cherishes. He never had this kind of loving playfulness with his father. Sam finished the sandwich and Dean quickly snatched it away. "Thanks."

Listening to his brother curse him, Dean grabbed his keys and headed for the door. He had a plan to meet Cas today. He never knew what they were going to do because Cas was just really strange sometimes. The last time Cas wanted to go do something he took him to a bee farm. The man had literally picked the bees up and laughed.

Dean really couldn't dislike him. If he was being real with himself he'd say that Cas was becoming a good friend. He enjoyed his company more than most other's. Sam had no idea that him and his mentor had gotten so close, and he really didn't see a reason for him to know. It's not like they were some weird couple.

Cas watched as Dean's impala pulled in. He really couldn't stop the excited feeling that spread through him. He knew that Dean was not into men, but he didn't let that crush his imagination. Dean was his first real friend since arriving here. It also helped that Dean could handle and sometimes laugh at his weird ideas and beliefs. He heard a knock at the door.

Going to the door he opened it and said, "You could not sneak up on anyone with the noise of that beast out front." The look of outrage on Dean's face was priceless.

"Whoa whoa guy! My Baby is no beast! She is a very lovely lady that deserves the respect of everyone." Cas chuckled and went to get a drink from the kitchen as Dean took up his usual seat on the 'cloud couch', as Dean called it.

"Would you like a drink?"

"Yeah, beer would be great." Cas retrieved the drinks and sat next to Dean so that he ws angled towards him. "Thanks."

"I thought we could sit and watch TV. I have case notes to go over and I know that you weren't fond of the bee idea last week." Dean shuttered a little and nodded.

"Sounds good, what're we watching Spok." Cas looked at him in confusion. "Oh c'mon, don't tell me you don't know who Spok is... Dude, where did you come from?"

"Obviously I am not from this plane of existence." Dean shook his head and looked through Cas' movie collection.

"Alright well this is the only thing that I could find that wasn't meant for a woman." Dean held up Ghostbusters.

"I feel as though I should be insulted." Dean laughed and popped in the movie as Cas gathered his notes. They spent the first couple minutes of the movie in silence and then Dean couldn't hold in his inherent movie quoting. Cas laughed soflty and stretched his leg out. His knee hit Dean's and he glanced up. Dean looked at his knee and then looked over at the painting hanging acroos from the door. He shook his head slightly and went back to scripting the movie. Cas wondered why Dean looked at that painting so often. Maybe he just really liked it, but Cas had a feeling he couldnt really place that was not the case.

They sat comfortably for another half hour, until Cas could no longer focus on his notes. He kept catching himself watch Dean's lips as he spoke the lines. He caught every small smile and he even made eye contact every so once in a while. Cas put his notes down and went for a drink of his tea when he realized it was gone.

"I'm gonna grab another drink. Would you like another?"

"Yeah, sure, that'd be great. Hey, you got any snacks in there? Nuts, popcorn... pie?" He looked up very seriously.

"Pie? Well, I don't think I have pie, but I do have popcorn."

"That's sinful. No pie." Dean scoffed and returned to the movie. Cas quickly made the popcorn and his tea and got another beer for Dean. When he sat back down it was closer to Dean. He put the popcorn bowl between them and laughed as Dean grabbed a whole handful and shoved it into his mouth. They went like this for the rest of the movie. Cas went to grab the last of the popcorn and met Dean's hand. Dean looked at him frowned.

"Rock paper scicors. Right now."

Cas was confused until Dean brought his hands up. "Oh, ok."

 _One. Two. Three. Shoot._

Dean lost and Cas laughed in triuph as he watched Dean pout when he ate the last of the popcorn. Suddenly Cas' cellphone went off. It was his office.

"I'm sorry, I'll be right back." He took the call and sighed after hanging up. He had to leave.

"What up?" Dean looked over at him.

"They need me to come in, there's been some kind of issue."

"Ok, well I'll get ghost then." Dean got his jacket and keys from the table. "Let me know when to head back your way."

"Thank you Dean." Cas walked him to the door and watched as Dean's eyes once again found the painting. "Dean, why do you look at that painting so much?"

Dean blushed a little at being caught and shrugged, "I guess I just have a thing for angels." He walked down to his Baby got in. Dean just sat there for a couple a minutes. He really wasn't sure how he felt right now. He had a sneaking suspicion that Cas had a thing for him. He knew that Cas watched him, and he couldn't lie to himself and say he hated it. He really confuses himself. Dean was not gay. Cas was just a friend. Dean saw Cas come out of his apartment in a nice shirt and slacks. He watched as his shoulders shifted as he locked his door. Dean watched him as he went to his car. At the last second before getting into his car Cas turned and looked at Dean.

"Shit." Dean quickly started the car and drove off.


	4. Chocolate-Oreo Pie

When Sam saw Dean he knew something was up. Dean never usually looked this confused. He watched as he came him, dropped his keys on the side table, and plopped down on the love seat. Sam waited for him to say something, but he never did. Dean just switched positions a few times as if he couldn't find a comfortable position to think in. As soon as Sam turned back towards the kitchen, the phone rang. Dean still didn't move, which was way weird, because Dean usually raced him to the phone. Sam answered and it was Bobby.

"Hey, uh, Ellen is almost holding a gun to my head. She wants to have a family dinner tonight. She said she's cooking..." Bobby was cut off by Dean's outburst.

"Oh she better! That woman made me garden two days in a row last weekend!" Obviously Dean had picked up the other phone and was listening in. There was a scuffling sound as Ellen clearly ripped the phone away from Bobby.

"Now you listen to me young'un. You volunteered to help with that project and if I recall you were laughing most of the time." Her motherly voice echoing through the reciever.

"Yeah, yeah. Are you gonna make those stuffed burgers? What about that chocolate-oreo pie? Now that I'd plant a million trees for. Worms and all." Dean replied cheerfully. Ellen made a disgusted noise.

"Can we not bring up the worm incident?" They both laughed, obviously sharing some inside joke that no one else was in on. "As for your food choices, I made the pie earlier today. The burgers would be easy to fix." Sam smiled as Ellen fed into Dean's inner fat-kid. He never understood how his brother ate so much and so unhealthy, but still remained as in shape as he was. They all hung up shortly after and Sam went to find Dean again.

This time Dean was laying prone on the couch and tapping the beat from _Living on a Prayer_ on the floor.

"Hey, Dean, you have anything on your mind?" Sam leaned against the ugly rose wallpaper the archway to the kitchen was decorated with.

Dean's head popped up and he kind of blushed, which was so unlike Dean, Sam began to wander if he'd been thinking of something he wouldn't like to share with the class, "Uh, no, not really. Just got a song stuck in my head."

"Dean, you only listen to Bon Jovi when you want to preoccupy yourself." Dean's eyes squinted and he rolled over.

"So, how is the Janie thing coming along?" Dean unsucessfully tried to change the topic.

"Her name is Jessica. She's great, and you're avoiding something. Who'd you go see today? Or any of the other days?" Sam crossed his arms and smiled at his older brother.

"I paint." Dean blurted as his face went red.

"I'm sorry, what?" Sam was totally confused.

"I paint. I go out and paint. I'm actually not bad. I have a vender named Lisa." Dean refused to look Sam in the eye. Dean thought this was better than telling him that he often visited with Cas and become all buddy-buddy.

"How come you never told anyone? Do you have pictures? How good are you?" Seeing that Sam was thuroughly diverted, Dean breathed a sigh of relief.

"Well, I'm actually pretty good. Not to ring my own bell or anything. I have pictures." Dean scrolled through his phone and showed Sam.

"Dean, Ellen is going to be so pissed you didn't tell her!" Stopped and looked at one particular painting longer than the others. It was the blue angel painting that hung in Castiel's apartment. "This one is my favorite."

Dean looked down and chuckled, "Yeah, seems to be a theme."

/

Everyone was sitting at the table laughing and having a good time. Dean went around looking at everyone's face. Ellen and Jo, Bobby and Sam, then there was Charlie who was picking on Ash. The one person's face he didn't see, but wanted to see the most was Cas'. Dean stopped and almost curled into his own mind, but Ellen's outrage pulled him from his thoughts.

"Dean Winchester! How could you keep this a secret from me!?" She was scrolling through his pictures on his phone, that Sam had stollen out from under his hand at some point.

"Well, it's not like it's the manliest thing in the world. Besides, if you knew all my secrets, how could I keep my mysterious air?" He pursed his lips and put his hand on his chin, which made Ellen and Jo laugh. Bobby was just drinking his beer witih a smile on his face. Dean looked at Sam and realized he had been staring at him with a look on his face. Sam was slowly realizing that Dean was keeping something from him, but obviously couldn't place it yet. Turning back to the table instead of meeting his brother's stare he said, "Did you know that Sam has a girlfriend?"

As the group turned their attention to Sam, Dean swiped his phone back and took a picture of the piece of pie on his plate. He sent the picture to Cas' number and said " _Now this is pie."_

/

The next day at work Dean could not concentrate on the building they were trying to put together. Cas had replied to his text saying " _Notes have been taken."_ Dean had smiled at the time, but now he is tossing himself back and forth. What the actual hell was going on with him. Cas was his friend sure,but this was just weird. He kept asking himself, why was he ok with watching Cas? Why was he ok with the thought Cas might like him, in a more than friends way. There has never been anything like this for him. Finally Dean gave up with the internal debate and started singing _Wanted Dead or Alive._ He got to the middle of the second verse before he realized that Sam had been right. He only sang Bon Jovi when he needed an internal distraction, and Cas was leading him to full on singing the stuff.

"What the hell." Dean muttered.


	5. Thou Shalt Not Kink Shame

Dean pulled out his phone and texted Cas. " _Want to get drinks after I get off work? Need something strong."_ He was almost nervous for the reply back, but that would be a pansy thing to feel just for asking a friend to get drunk with him. The bing sounded and Dean opened the message, " _Sure. Had a very bad day. Need the same"_ Well, if Cas has had a bad day, there was no need to explain.

Dean watched the clock in agony. It was moving too damn slow to him. He wasn't excited to see Cas, he was ready to get wasted for no good reason. That's what he kept telling himself anyway. Finally the damn whistle blew at six and everyone stopped what they were doing and put the equiptment away. As Dean was headed to his car a man came rushing past him and bumped him sideways.

"Hey, look where you're going you dick!" The guy just turned, flipped him off, and kept moving foward. "This fucking guy..." Dean's mood had gone foul and he wished he could cancel with Cas and just drink by himself.

Dean pulled up to the bar him and Cas had agreed on and got out. He turned and came nose to nose with Castiel. "Jesus Cas!" He jumped backward and had to catch Cas as he almost hit the pavement from the outburst.

"I'm sorry. You look rather pissed off."

"Yeah... Who are we shooting tonight? Jack or Jim?" Dean shrugged and started walking towards the bar. Cas didn't answer as he followed. They both took seats at the bar and Dean surveyed the place. There was a cute redhead who saw Dean enter and was trying to catch his attention with the soft curve of her ass. Cas didn't see him wink at her.

Cas was scowling at the polished wood until the bartender came up and took their orders. They were into shot three before they spoke.

"Some of my cases are ridiculous. These people do not deserve to be defended." Cas just stared at the amber liquid in his shot glass before he finally threw it back.

"Most people don't deserve the air they breathe, but that's how life works." Dean followed with his shot and Cas got up.

"I'm going to the bathroom. I'll be right back." He stalked away and Dean saw the redhead choose that moment to pop around the pool table. She must have thought this was her chance. He smile in encouragement.

Cas watched as the redheaded female swayed her hips over to Dean's seat. He saw him smile at her and his mood darkened even farther. What did he see in her? He was buzzed and obviously had something on his mind. She couldn't help him with that. Not the way he could. Cas continued on into the bathroom and waited a few minutes before emerging to reclaim his seat. He came up to the bar as the female left. Dean was slipping a piece of paper into his inside jacket pocket.

"Dean I want to show you something. Will you come back to my apartment with me?" Dean lost his smile an little and looked at him warily.

"You gonna tie me up and hold me hostage?" At this Cas couldn't help but smile a little.

"No. This is something I keep secret. You're my closest friend and I think you should know my darkside." Dean looked interested.

"Does your darkside have cookies?"

"It seems it needs to have a lot of sweets." They both walked out and decided to walk. Cas' place was only a ten minute walk. They walked in silence and Dean's curiousity grew. They reached his door and Dean instinctively looked towards the painting. It was a constant reminder of his own secret. Dean walked to the couch.

"No, follow me." Cas walked on through to his bedroom. Dean was wary at first, but he shrugged it off and followed anyway. Cas pointed to the edge of the bed and Dean complied without comment. "Now, before I show you, I wwant you to know that you can leave at any time."

"Damn it Cas, stop drawig circles and show me." Dean didn't know whether his fight for flight sense was stronger. He was curious, but he really didn't want himself to be. He should be weirded out that he was sitting on another man's bed, and that man was about to show him something he was sure was about to change their friendship. He didn't want to know why he wanted to know everything Cas had to tell him. Damn it! This wasn't his jig!

Cas could see the internal struggle Dean was going through and decided that the fact he hadn't run away yet was his cue to begin the show. Cas walked to a closet door and popped the lock. The interior was a deep purple and there were various shelves of leather and metal.

Dean just stared at it all. He couldn't wrap his mind around the fact his best friend had just opened up a kink shop in his bedroom. "Cas... I really had no idea that when I asked you if you were gonna tie me up, you actually could." Cas smiled a little, but he didn't move. He didn't want Dean to run. "When I imagined your darkside this was not the black leather that popped into my head." Cas squinted his eyes as if he didn't understand. "Dude, Star Wars reference... No? You need a serious educational day." Dean inched forward to see more. Cas smiled more as he saw Dean look at the leather cuffs with interest. "Well, I believe today has been very long. What do you do with this?"

"That specific tool, or in general?" Cas ran a finger across the various instruments.

"In general." Dean watched his finger move across the smooth surface.

"It helps. I have a somwhat 'God Complex' some would say, but it is not just for me. This kind of theropy help both parties." Dean looked straight at Cas as he shut the door.

"Well, ok. Uhhh, I'm going to head home. I need to check on Sammy." Dean got up and move towards the front door. Cas followed and he couldn't stop him from watching the swagger with which Dean walked.

Just before Dean reached the front door Cas asked, "Dean, this does not change anything right?" Dean stopped and turned. He couldn't help but notice the slightly worried tone his friend's voice had taken.

"No Cas, we are still cool. Thou shalt not kink shame. Hey I like pie. You like leather. There's not a difference there." Dean smiled and clapped him on the shoulder. Cas smiled and thanked him as he shut the door behind him.

/

Dean was pulling in when Sam came rushing out.

"Where were you? Charlie is here and she is irate. She refuses to talk to me." Dean quickly gets out of the impala.

 _ShitShitShitShit..._ Dean thought to himself.

"Dean, why are you shitting yourself?" Sam asked clearly confused, "Do you know why she's mad?"

"Uh, no." But he had all sorts of ideas running around in his head and they all revolved around a blue eyed kink fest. It could be his paranoia as well.

As soon as Charlie laid eyes on Dean he wanted to turn and run. She pulled him by his shirt into his room. She shut the door and wheeled around on him pointing her finger at his chest.

"Why didn't you tell me?!" She angrily whispered. Dean's look of confusion turned into one of caution.

"Tell you what?"

"Let's start with the fact that you are bisexual!" Her angry whipsers were getting louder.

"What the hell? Charlie, I am NOT bisexual? Where did you get that from?" He put his hands up in defense.

"I saw you Dean. You've been meeting someone. Sam told me so. I was at the bar. I saw you walk in with him, and then that hot redhead with the great toosh, but you left with him. You were practically tranced as you followed him out."

"Whoa, Charlie, that's Cas. He's just my friend. I met him through Sam. We are just friends. I don't think Sam would like me Robin Hooding and Little Johning his mentor. That's why I haven't told him, or anyone else." She crossed her arms and lookat him skeptically.

"I saw the way you looked after him as he got up, and how he scowled when the girl walked up to you. So if you're 'just friends' where did you go when you left?"

Dean pursed his lips. He so did not want to get into this with her, or with himself for that matter. "Charlie, we are just friends."

She glared at Dean, "Fine." She shrugged it off and walked out. He heard her say good bye to Sam. He came around the door frame.

"What did she want?" Sam was looking at Dean as if he was looking for any clue that would say that Dean was lying.

"She didn't really get to the point, but I guess I was able to appease her. Could you shut my door? I'm still a little buzzed and would like to sleep the rest of it off. Sam looked like he wanted to stay and ask more, but Dean shrugged out of his jacket and boots and laid down. Dean closed his eyes and breathed deep until he fell asleep, NOT thinking off Cas.


	6. The Dream

Dean looked around with anticipation, but he couldn't say why. He took in the room. It was Cas'. Cas was standing in front of THE closet. He was shirtless and had on basketball shorts that hung loosely around his hips. Dean couldn't stop himself from licking his bottom lip. Cas turned his head to look at him and smiled. He was pulling out leather cuffs with buckles and clips on them. Dean felt himself instinctually move towards the end of the bed he'd been sitting on. Cas smiled sweetly at him until he got right up in Dean's face. He then took Dean by the neck and forced his head to one side.

Cas ran his nose along Dean's jawline and up behind his ear, stopping only to nip at his earlobe. Dean shuttered and smiled a little. He felt his lower half start to heat up and the anticipation grew with each stroke Castiel made along Dean's neck. Every time Cas bit him Dean couldn't contain his twitch. He wanted to pull against Cas' hold and return the favor, but he didn't want to break the moment. Cas pulled him off the bed and turned him around, still holding him by the throat. He pressed himself and Dean could feel that he was hard. Cas very swiftly bent Dean over making his face bounce against the matress.

Dean shot straight up in his bed, panting. He looked down in disbelief at his arousal. "Oh HELL no." He had not just had a god damned wet dream about Castiel. He didn't know what the fuck to do with himself. He couldn't very well talk to Sam about it, or Bobby. He looked at the clock on his bed side table. It said 2:34. Dean reached for his phone, maybe Charlie was still up. He had to pace, so he went outside and dialed her number.

"Dean? Is everything ok?" She sounded winded.

"Well, yes, but no. Were you running?"

"We will say I was... What's up Dean?"

"Will you meet me? I need to talk, or something."

"Sure, let me get dressed."

They picked a location and Dean got the impala started. He listened to the sound of the engine and felt a little better. He felt like he needed to establish some of his masculinity again. Cas was taking over his mind.

He drove to the small 24/7 coffee shop Charlie had specified. She was sitting at a small green table when he strolled up and plopped in the adjacent seat. She raised an eyebrow at him. Dean went to say exactly what happened, but he stopped. He couldn't make himself say it. All he could do is stare at her with his mouth slightly open in a panicked desperation. He let his head fall down and land hard on the table.

"Dean, I can't help you if you don't tell me what's wrong..." He just grunted, "Is this about your boyfriend?"

His head popped and he scowled at her, "He is NOT my BOYFRIEND..." He thought about what was about to come out of his mouth and he just looked down and scowled at his lap, "Son of a bitch."

"Deaaaan, tell me what's going on."

"I'm not gay!" He looked at her for confirmation. She just looked at him with skeptimism. Dean shook his head and sighed, "I had a dream."

"Well, aren't we just the next MLK. Did it involve a certain lawyer?"

"Yes."

"What happened in this dream?" Dean just stared at her with a dead expression. Her face brightened and she clapped her hands together, "You had a sex dream! You can't say that's not gay Dean!"

"I'm not gay Charlie... but he is taking over my brain. He's like an itch I can't scratch. He's my friend, but he showed me his dark side."

"OOOOOOOH! Star Wars will take over the planet! He has a dark side... let me guess. He has a foot fetish?"

"No, not that I know of. He's a kink fest Charlie. Like the whips and chains. The being tied down and spanking." He sat back in his seat and resituated himself in his pants. It was really weird, but every time he brought up the leather shit he flet himself heat up. He looked at her in distress.

"Dean. Bro. You have a thing for this guy. You are going to have to accept this. IT'S SO GREAT! You know what this means? I'm not the only one anymore! Hop on the homo-train Dean. I promise it's a great ride." Her enthusiasm made him smile a little. He was still distraught on the inside, but he did feel a little better. Charlie was the little sister he never had. Dean loved her very much.


	7. First Kiss

Cas was sitting on his couch staring at his painting. He was missing Dean. He knew he hadn't scared him away, but he was afraid that if he called him and asked him to come over or to meet up somewhere Dean would say no. Maybe he had weirded him out a little too much. Cas knew that his secret was a lot to take in. Not everyone can handle that kind of relationship. Not that he was trying to force Dean into anything, but Cas has a very hard time not imagining being with Dean. Strapping him down and making him sweat. Or better yet have Dean leave marks on his back because he's so close to busting he has no choice but to claw at him.

Cas shook his head to clear the fantasy away, but it wouldn't leave his mind completely. He felt himself get hard and growled in frustration. Cas had on loose, thin sweatpants. He tried to rearrange himself, but he bit his lip when his hand made contact. All of a sudden there was a knock at the door. Cas' hand snapped away and he blushed as if he'd been caught. He awkwardly stood up and wrapped a blanket around his shoulders so he could hide his hard on from who ever was at the door.

"Um, Hello? How can I help you?" The bright red headed female was looking at him intently.

"My name is Charlie. I would like to have a word with you." She pushed past him and he looked after her as she took up Dean's seat on the couch.

"Uh, yeah, sure, but who are you? Would you like me to dress further?" He was blushing and not making eye contact. His eyes snapped to her though when she said she was Dean's sister. "I wasn't aware Dean had a little sister."

"Well, we aren't blood related, but family doesn't end in blood. No you don't have to put a shirt on, this won't take long." She patted the cushion beside her and he sat as he was told. Force of habit he guessed.

"Now, I know that you are very much into Dean." She held up her hand when he went to protest, "Don't deny it, because I saw how you looked at the girl at the bar. I was there. I also know that Dean is into you." At this Cas' mouth fell open a little. Then he glared at her. How dare she lie to him. Cas knew Dean wasn't gay. Again she held up her hand to stop him from interrupting her, "We talked last night. He called me around two forty last night. He had a dream. He's never really been into anyone seriously in his life, especially a man." Cas couldn't believe his ears. It's as if his prayer was being answered.

"I'm here to tell you though, If you hurt him in anyway, mentally or physically against his will, I will find you and I will kill you. I will castrate you first and make sure you see your balls before I let you bleed out, but death will soon follow." She met his eyes and smiled hugely. "But on a happier note, I'm so in love with the fact that Dean is into you! It's so great. It's cute. He blushes when he talks about it, it's just awesome." Cas couldn't help but blush and smile himself. He giggled and brought his knees to his chest. Charlie smiled at him and told him to stand up.

"I want to inspect you. Let's see what has Dean so riled up." He got up, but he was really self conscious now. She stripped the blanket off of him and spread out his arms. He was very thankful he had lost all of the bloodflow in his pants by now. "Turn." He did as he was told and blushed. "You are in very nice shape. You have acute bottom on a male's standard. I still prefer the lady booty, but yours works for Dean." Cas laughed. He couldn't help it. He thought Charlie was a peach. She walked towards the door and wrote a number on a sticky note she pulled out of her bag.

"This is my number. Call me if you every need advice or you know, just want to talk about all the lovely gay things." She turned and gave him a hug after he opened the door, "Make my boy happy and all will be well."

He returned the hug full force, "Thank you, Charlie." She shrugged her shoulders merrily and skipped away down the hall."

Castiel smiled as he shut the door. He was so happy he felt as though he could could fly. He couldn't contain the happy feeling he got when he thought of Dean being into him. He heard his phone go off. He picked it up and saw two messages. One was from Dean and the other from his brother, Gabriel.

The one from Dean read, " _Can I come over? Need to talk."_ He replied saying of course, and moved on to his brother's text. _"Hey lil bro. gonna be there around 8. Be ready. I got the sweets. -Gabe"_ Cas looked at his clock, and it was already six. He sighed and told him that he would be ready. He then went to his bedroom to change, but thought better of it. Charlie had said his ass looked good in these, maybe Dean would think so as well.

/

Dean sat in Baby for a solid five minutes before he could move. He couldn't remember a time when he had been this nervous. He was about to change his and Cas' relationship, and his life for that matter, forever. He got out and walked to Cas' door. He wasn't about to pansy out now. Charlie would kick his ass into next week. Probably on a Tuesday. Dean hates Tuesdays. Shaking his head he knocked on the door; a little harsher than he meant to. Cas called for him to come in. Dean walked in and stopped in his tracks.

Cas was sprawled out on his couch, looking oh so comfortable in nothing but a pair of sweats. One leg was pulled up to show his calf and the other looked like it had fallen down, but Cas had been too lazy to fix it. His hair was tossled and sticking up in places. Dean thought he looked... hot. Trying not to psych himself out he shut the door and went to sit in his seat on the couch, right at Cas' feet. Cas was smiling as Dean sat.

"How are you today?" Dean watched Cas' lips as he spoke and remembered those lips on his neck in his dream.

"I'm freaking fantastic." He didn't mean to sound so gruff, but he couldn't help it. He'd never done anything like this before.

"Something on your mind, Dean?" Cas squinted his eyes and cocked his head sideways. He couldn't hide the small smile though. Dean had a suspicion that Cas was laughing at him.

"Look... I... I mean.. Shit. Cas I..." Dean was becoming more and more flustered. Cas was suddenly all up in his bubble. Maybe three inches from Dean's face. Cas looked at Dean's lips and back up into his eyes. As if asking for permission. Dean in turn looked at Cas' lips and back up into his eyes. Cas brought their lips together. Dean stiffened and his eyes went wide, but he slowly melted into the kiss. Closing his eyes and meeting Cas' enthusiasm with his own. It was a very sweet and unrushed kiss. Dean thought it ended all too soon.

Castiel pulled back and met Dean's stare. Green versus blue. Cas' hand came up to cup Dean's face. They were both blushing as Dean leaned his face slightly into his hand. Dean looked back down at Cas' mouth and he stayed there. He bit his lip and he heard Cas groan. He felt his hand slide from his cheek to the back of his head, and Cas pulled on the short hair in the back. He then made Dean look at him as he pulled his head towards his for a more wild kiss.

Dean grabbed Cas' shoulders to pull him closer. Cas was seated on Dean's lap and he pushed him back so he was leaning on the arm of the couch. Cas was in full control and Dean didn't mind. He felt Cas' tongue run across his lips and he only hesitated a second before he opened his mouth to let Cas explore. Cas' tongue took over Dean's mouth as he conquered every inch with his own tongue. Dean began to respond in kind and Cas growled in approval. They had to stop the kiss to breathe.

When they both pulled away, they were panting. Cas sat back and pulled Dean up with him. Keeping a hold of Dean's hand they sat and waited for their breathing to return to normal.

"So.. Yeah.. I think that went well." Cas smiled shyly up at Dean's comment.

"I think you might be right." Cas' phone chose that moment to go off. It was Gabriel.

"Hello Gabe." Cas said with no enthusiasm.

"Aye! Little Brother. So I'm outside your house. I know I'm a little early, but I didn't think you would mind. By the way, there is a SWEEEET ass car out front. Its an impala. Anyway be there in point two." Gabe hung up and Cas shot off the couch.

"SHIT!" Dean was confused.

"What's going on Cas?" Cas turned and looked at him with sympathy.

"You're about to meet my brother." All the blood left Dean's face as the door flew open.


	8. Blow Pop

A man wearing bright red aviators come through the door way and strode past Cas and Dean without a second glance.

"Hey, little brother, I know you weren't prepared, but you couldv'e already had dinner on." He put two plastic bags full of something on the kitchen counter. Dean doesn't think the man has noticed him yet. Cas looked at him and shrugged.

"Gabe-" Cas was cut off.

"No, no. I understand, you don't want to spoil me, I get it. I'm just saying, some solid food before all this candy would've been..." He turned and look straight at Dean. "Weeeell, hello there stud. Castiel Novak, why didn't you tell me you already had the candy for tonight?"

"Gabriel... This is Dean. He is, uh.." Cas looked at him and Dean stepped forward, outstretching his hand.

"I'm his best friend." Gabe looked at him wryly. He shook his hand and looked at Cas in amusement.

"A pleasure to see you, best friend. Cas, pal, I would like a word with you, if you please." Gabriel walked into Cas' open bedroom door. Cas followed and let his head fall back as he huffed. They didn't shut the door so Dean could see everything. Gabe had a hold of Cas' shoulders. He looked like he was excited and Cas was smiling. Dean was beginning to feel awkward when Gabriel walked right up to him and kissed him on both cheeks. Dean blushed and couldn't do anything but stare at him.

"You were right, Bro. He's as red as my favorite blow pop." Dean stepped back to create space.

"Cas, I'm just gonna go."

"UM NO. You can't just walk out on me. I didn't even know you existed. You will stay here. If it helps I have pie." Dean's eyes snapped to Gabriel's face.

"What kind of pie?"

"AHHH we got a fan. I have blueberry and apple." Dean's face lit up and he took his jacket off.

As the night went on Dean was enjoying the brother's banter and found out he enjoyed Gabe and his sense of humor. It was getting to be late when Dean got a message from Sam. _Where are you?_ Dean replied he was on his way.

"Alright, I have to head home. Sam is beginning to wonder where I'm at." Dean grabbed his jacket and headed for the door.

"Oh, alright boyfriend. See you some other time." Gabe didn't look at him, but he knew he was gaging his reaction. Dean stiffened and stopped walking.

" Uhh, yeah... See ya." Cas walked with him out to the impala.

"Don't mind Gabriel. He can be a bit of a romantic." Dean was stiff and awkward. He grunted in response. The word boyfriend kept dancing around his brain. He opened his door and turned to Cas. Cas just moved a little closer and looked up at him. Dean felt his face get hot and cursed.

"Son of a bitch. Cas.." He looked down at Cas' mouth and shifted his weight from foot to foot.

"Yes Dean?" Cas just smiled up at him. He wasn't going to help him. Dean closed his eyes and exhaled heavily. Dean leaned down without thinking and kissed Cas once. He went to pull away but stopped and kissed him again. He cupped his face and he felt Cas smile. After the kiss was over Dean got into the car.

"Will I see you tomorrow?" Cas held the door open.

"After work I can come."

"Good. I will see you then. I hope you have pleasant dreams." Dean's eyed Cas with heat.

"See you tomorrow." Dean pulled away and Cas giggled all the way back inside.

Cas shut the door and turned to find his brother smiling shrewdly at him, "You really like him. Has he drove you to sin yet? Please tell me you've at least tasted that lollipop." Cas blushed and rolled his eyes.

"Go away Gabriel."

"Oh c'moooon, Cas. Tell me." They both went to sit on the couch.

"Yes, Gabriel, I really like him. He has never been with a male before. We kissed for the first time today. Actually you assbutt," Cas scowled at his brother, "that is what you walked in on."

"Well, I apologize. Had I known, we couldv'e rescheduled. But alas, I was never told you were seeing anyone." Gabe got comfy and shoved a snickers into his mouth. As he chewed around the nuts and caramel he said, "Does he know? About the whole dominance thing?"

"Yes. I showed it to him before he decided anything." Cas smirked in satisfaction, "He dreamt of me and my ... dominance." Gabriel laughed and informed his younger brother he was going to crash on the couch. Cas grabbed a throw blanket and laid it on the arm. He went to his shower feeling as if he could fly.

/

Dean walked in through the front door and Sam was sitting in the chair facing the door with his best bitchface on. He flicked his hair out of his face and tapped his foot. His arms were crossed and Dean knew he was screwed. And not in the way that was in mind.

"I'm tired of being kept in the dark. You will tell me what is going on with you." His little brother cared about him and Dean knew that, but it hard to keep that in mind when he used that condensending tone. Dean pushed aside his pride and sat infront of him.

"Sammy. Listen. This is going to sound weird, but I have a friend. He's really my only friend." Dean was beginning to blush and he watched Sam with caution.

"He? So.. you haven't been sneaking "off to see some woman? Who's this friend? Why was this such a big deal to keep from me?" His face didn't lose the bitchiness, but it did change to a more confused look.

"Uh, well.. It's Cas." Sam nearly came out of his seat.

"You mean Castiel? Castiel Novak? My mentor?"

"Uh, yeah. That's him."

"Why was that such a secret?" Dean looked up at Sam confused.

"It's not weird for you?" Sam repositioned and laughed.

"Dean you can have friends. I don't care who it is. Even if it is my boss." Dean laughed in relief.

"Well, thank you Lord Sammy." Dean couldn't bring himself to tell Sam the rest. He wouldn't be so understanding of him sleeping with his idol. Even if it only happened in his mind so far.

"Alright well, since this was a waste of my anger, I'll go call Jessica." Dean put his hand on Sam's shoulder.

"Have you asked her out yet?"

"Yeah.. about that..." Sam looked down. Dean shook his head.

"You can't win them-" Sam laughed.

"She said yes. We are going out on Friday night. I'm taking her to the science museum and then a dinner."

"Well, I was worried that you were going to bore her to death, but at least she'll be fed." Dean winked at his little brother.

Sam flipped him off and sauntered off to his room. Dean was feeling a little guilty as he headed for the shower. Maybe he shouldv'e told Sam about him and Cas. Then he had a thought. _How did Cas know about his dream?_

"Chaaarlie." She was lucky he loved her. He thought about loving her to death.


	9. Ask Me Nicely

**Author's Note: Thank you for the feed back. I would love more. Beware of the next couple of chapter's though. Feelings are about to be hurt. :)**

Cas rolled over and his hand found someone's shoulder. He was laying on his stomach, but he didn't need to see to know who it was.

"Gabriel. We have talked about this. Why are you in my bed again?" He felt the bed vibrate from Gabe's laughter.

"I had a nightmare little brother. You know me. You're my comfort object. When I'm around you I can pretend that I defied Dad, just like you."

"I was talking in my sleep again, wasn't I?" Cas shook his head, "Why do you like to listen? My nightmares are none of your business." He pushed himself up to see his brother lying on his back with his arms folded across his chest.

"You said his name last night Cas. Multiple times."

"That's impossible Gabriel."

"Why is it impossible?" Cas shook his head.

"Because as much as I like Dean, there's no way I could really care for him; and it's Dad's fault. You know that."

"Castiel. You have feelings. I don't give a damn what that old man made you go through, or how much he trained you. You still have a heart Cas. Run from it as you might." Cas just shook his head and got up to brush his teeth. He had to go to the office before he could see Dean later today.

* * *

Dean woke up to Ellen up in his grill. He rubbed the sleep out of his eyes, but she was still there. "Ellen. Do you realize it's five in the morning?"

"Yes, boy, I realize. I'm here to be your alarm clock, and to tell you that we are having a family night tonight and Sam is bringing Jess. You are to bring a friend and Jo will bring her beau." Dean just looked at her.

"I don't have a girlfriend." He tried not to smile as he thought of Cas in a dress.

"A friend will do, Son. Tonight will be for Sam. He wants to show off his new gal."

"Yes, Ellen." She nodded like she was satisfied. She left and Dean got up to grab a shower before work.

* * *

Sam was sitting nervous on the couch. Jessica was suppoed to get here in ten minutes. His whole family, except for Dean, was preparing for the dinner tonight. He hoped that everyone liked her. He wasn't certain who Dean was going to bring, but he hoped it was Castiel.

* * *

Dean knocked on Cas' door and he let himself in after he heard Cas yell for him. "Cas? You ok?"

"Dean. I'm freaking out. I don't know what I'm doing. I don't do family affairs." Cas walked up to Dean in the midst of a panic.

"Whoa, buddy, slow down. You're coming as my friend. Tonight is all about Sammy. They will probably ask you what you do and that'll be it. Don't sweat it." Cas sighed and laid his head on Dean's chest. At first Dean didn't know what to do, but he eventually wrapped his arms around him and patted his back. "It will be ok, Cas." Cas wrapped his arms around Dean's hips and looked up from his chest.

"Do they know? About us?" Dean looked away and pursed his lips, "I didn't really expect them to. This is new and all. When do you think you will tell them Dean?"

"I don't know Cas. I still haven't really bit the bullet all the way through yet myself. Sam won't understand. I don't know how I would even bring it up." Dean believed that he had a certain reputation to uphold in his family's eyes. Being with Cas would shatter that. He wasn't sure if that's what he wanted.

"You'll know when the time is right. How much time do we have before we have to be there?" Cas pulled away and slank back into his bedroom.

Dean checked his watch and said, "We have about half an hour before dinner starts, so we should probably leave within the next ten minutes." Dean walked into the bedroom and watched Cas change his shirt. The lean muscles stretched across his back and bunched at the shoulders. He wanted to run his fingers over them. Cas sensed Dean was watching him and he turned and smiled darkly.

Cas strutted over to him and pushed him down on the bed. He straddled his hips and grabbed the front of his shirt, "Like what you see?" Dean flushed and stared hard at Cas.

"Y-yes." He stuttered.

"Mmm. Good. Ask me nicely." Dean eyes kept flicking between Cas' eyes and his lips.

"Ask you for what?"

"The kiss you keep looking for." Dean pulled his lips tight together and just stared at him, "Suit yourself, but just know I won't do it unless you ask me to." Cas went to pull back and get off, but Dean stopped him with a firm grip.

"Please."

"Please what, Dean?'

"Please.. kiss me." Cas smiled and pulled him up by his shirt with more strength than necessary. Their lips met and Dean closed his eyes. Cas' lips were so soft and full. Dean deepened the kiss. They were both losing breath when Dean flipped Cas over and pinned him to the bed. He bit Cas' lower lip. Castiel's back arched off the bed and he pushed against Dean's hold.

Dean broke the kiss and was looking down at Cas in amazement. Every kiss got better, and it was so much greater than any female he'd ever kissed. "Now we have five minutes." Cas blushed and kissed Dean once more, quickly before he got up and finished dressing.

They were out the door and on their way, much to Castiel's anxiety. He SOO did not do family things.


	10. On the Wall

**Author's Note: This is my first attempt at writing something sexual. I apologize if you find it awkward. Again, be prepared for the next couple of chapters.**

Dean pulled up to his little house and looked at Cas once more before getting out. He was holding himself together for the time being. He was sure his family would like Cas. He's had to reassure him twice that he would be ok. Cas just needed to smile and make the occasional comment and he would blend right in. He went to Cas' door since he looked like he needed help getting out of the car.

"Castiel Novak. Get your ass out of my car. You will be fine, just don't be a weirdo. Even if you do end up being a weirdo, there will always be someone here that can relate. So let's go sunshine." Cas looked up at him and got out quietly. "See, if you're quiet like this, they will tear you to pieces." Cas rolled his eyes. Dean stopped him and pulled him towards him. He checked to make sure no one was peeping on them and then leaned down to kiss him sweetly on the cheek. "You will fine. My family will like you regardless because you're here with me." That gave Cas a little more hope for tonight. That and the kiss made him feel better.

They both strolled up and Charlie opened the door before Dean could. "Hello! You must be Castiel. My name is Charlie, it's so nice to finally meet you. Dean has talked about you." Dean glared at her ruse. Cas blushed and smiled at her as he took her outstretched hand. "We were all just going to the table now."

"Dean! Thank you for gracing us with your presence. Who is your friend?" Bobby got up off the couch with Ellen at his side. Sam came up with a very pretty blonde beside him and Jo came up behind Ellen holding a handsome boy's hand.

"This is Cas. He is my close friend. He's also Sammy's boss." Cas smiled and shook Bobby's hand, then Ellen's. He fist bumped Sam and Jo just walked right up to him and gave him a hug. It wasn't as awkward as he had anticipated. Cas was feeling much better, but still out of place when he stepped back next to Dean. He made sure he wasn't too close, but he could reach out and feel Dean's hand inconspicuously. Sam introduced Jessica and Jo introduced William.

Cas watched as Dean hugged Jessica and he shook hand with William. He'd have to remember to ask him how he could be so comfortable with a complete stranger. Cas felt like he was trying to crawl out of his own skin just standing in the presence of Dean's family. He figured Dean's father was the rugged one in the ball cap. He had talked to Sam a little about their family so he knew that the woman wasn't their mother. She had died when Sam was very young. He never spoke about his father though.

They all traveled to a large round table. Everyone took up a seat. The table was loaded with food and everyone began dishing it out. Bobby was picking on Jo because she was giggling at William, which Cas guessed wasn't normal for her given Bobby's comment. Cas felt himself start to retreat in on himself. He didn't belong here. This was not something he was equipped to deal with. All of a sudden he felt Dean put his hand on his knee and squeeze, as if to say he was "all good". Dean looked at him and smiled, trying to tell him everything was ok. Cas smiled as Ellen threw a roll at him. Sam was smiling at Jessica. Everyone was having such a good time. Was this what a real family felt like? Is this budding warmth inside him something that most everyone felt around their families?

Dean saw Cas physically relax and felt better. He knew Cas was socially awkward, but he wanted him to have a good time. His family had just let him fall right in. Soon Cas was making more of an effort to be apart of the group. Dean smiled at him. He had a feeling of being watched and looked straight at Charlie, who had been sitting back with a cocked eyebrow. She blew him a kiss and he winked at her. She looked shocked and then leaned forward and mouthed, _for real?_ He nodded at her and she broke out in giggles. Dean looked at Sam and he was practically worshipping Jessica. She was blushing and laughing at something Bobby said. He had never seen his little brother so happy. Everything was perfect in this moment.

* * *

Dean was walking Cas back up to his apartment. Tonight had gone so wonderfully he was whistling all the way there. Cas had taken his hand. When they got to the door Cas pulled him through.

"Thank you Dean." Cas pulled them to the bedroom.

"For what? If it was the pie, that was all Ellen. She makes a rockin' cherry pie." He started humming the tune of Cherrie Pie and Cas giggled.

"For inviting me tonight. I've never experienced anything like that with my own family. It was nice to see a family who really loves each other." Dean smiled at the thought of how much he loved his family. Cas was removing his clothes and he looked at over at Dean. "Come shower with me." Dean froze. Cas saw his hesitation and crooked his finger at him. Dean walked over to him in silence. Cas pulled him into the bathroom and shut the door. Dean was stiff and awkward.

Dean stood there blushing. Cas removed his leather jacket and tossed it against the wall. Dean was eyeing him the entire time. He was tapping a beat against his leg with his middle finger.

"Do you need my help? Because if you do, you have to ask me." Cas was already looking at him as if he were naked. Dean's breath was quickening and the guy hadn't even touched him. And didn't that just make his T levels rise.

"W-will you help me?" Dean muttered out.

"With what?" Cas stepped closer again and waited.

"Undress." It sounded like a cough. Dean had never seen another man naked before. It was new, but he was almost excited, only because it was Cas.

"That's a good boy." Cas cooed in a deep voice. He began unbuttoning his flannel slowly. One button at a time. He used his open shirt to pull him down to kiss him. Dean kept his hands down as Cas discarded his shirt. He shivered in his new found freedom. Cas then went for his belt buckle. Dean again kept his hands to himself as Castiel moved from his mouth to his jaw line. Making a line from the bottom of his chin to the soft spot right behind his ear. This time when Dean shuttered it had nothing to do with the breeze. He felt his pants loosen and slide down. Cas followed his pant, leaving a trail of kisses down his chest and along his abs and it ended right at the beginning of his happy trail. Cas looked up from his position and licked his bottom lip. Dean shut his eyes and tried to calm his shaking hands.

Cas got up from taking Dean's pants off and did the same with his boxers. When Dean was standing naked in front of him Cas stared for a second or two, appreciating the view. Dean was half hard and trying to fight it. Cas removed the rest of his clothes and pulled him toward the massive waterfall shower. He made the spray hot and pulled Dean through the door.

"Dean look at me." He did as he was told and lost all train of thought. Cas' crystal blue eyes were heated and looking straight into his soul. "You don't have to hide from me." He looked down and realized he had unconsciously covered himself with his hands.

"Cas.. I.." He couldn't think of anything to say. Cas smiled a little and shook his head.

"Stop thinking. If we are going to do this, you have to stop over thinking it."

"I don't know what to do."

"That's what I'm here for. Let me take over. Do as I tell you and you will be fine." He couldn't help but to admire his confidence. Dean took a deep breath and finally looked at Castiel. He'd imagined what he looked like naked, but he hadn't done him justice. He was lean but very well built. You'd never be able to tell through a suit. Dean's eyes traveled farther down, all while blushing. Partly from embarrassment and partly in arousal. Cas was beautiful. Dean reached out to touch him but stopped short. "No, touch me. Explore me."

Dean's hands shook as he made contact with Cas' pecks. He trailed his hands down and around his hips. In a moment of no thought Dean roughly pulled Cas up against him. The moment his body made contact, Cas slammed Dean against the wall and pinned him with his own body. Dean felt himself harden even further at the display of power. Deans hands traveled down Cas' lower back. He was soaked from the shower and his skin was so soft. His hands moved down and cupped Cas' ass. It was round and plump. It filled his hands perfectly.

Cas growled in approval. He kissed Dean hard and pressed himself closer. Dean could feel Cas' hard on. It didn't scare him anymore. He wanted to please Cas. He wanted him to use him so he could be happy. That would make him happy.

Dean deepened the kiss. His tongue sliding into Cas' mouth and fighting his tongue for dominance. Suddenly Cas pulled away and grabbed a rag. "We need to get clean." He poured a little body wash on his wash cloth. He then began washing Dean. He stood still as he let the bubbles spread. Cas told him to turn and he washed his back. He ran the cloth down and over his ass. Making sure that he squeezed before he came back up. It made Dean chuckle.

"Turn." He did as he was told and Cas looked him right in eye as he grabbed his dick with the wash cloth. Dean sucked in a harsh breath and leaned back against the wall. Cas made sure to make a few strokes and to clean his balls. Dean closed his eyes and reveled in the friction. Cas smiled and stopped. Dean looked at him and Cas bit his lip.

"Is it your turn?" Dean was becoming more bold. Cas looked impressed and nodded. Dean grabbed the wash cloth and added more soap. He started on his chest and made sure everything was getting washed. He was standing under the spray so the soap was washing off as fast as Dean was applying it. He was a little bigger than Cas so he had no problem wrapping his arms around so he could wash his back and his ass. He pushed him towards the wall. "Hands on the wall." Dean wasn't asking. Cas breathed in as his hands made contact with the tile. Dean spread Cas' legs a little more and went to his knees and washed down the back of both of Cas' thighs. When he came back up he turned inward and washed around his main focus. Cas's breath was coming faster and harsher. Every time Dean got near his erection he shuttered.

Cas finally turned around and took Dean's hand. He wrapped it around his own arousal and moved Dean's hand for him. Dean met Cas' eyes and grinned. That drove Cas crazy. He pushed Dean under the spray and finished cleaning himself off. He shut off the shower.

"Lets get dry." His voice was rough and Dean was pleased with himself because he knew he was the reason why. Dean never thought that him making Cas grit his teeth would be a turn on.

Cas pulled on a pair of sweats and threw a pair to Dean. He slipped them on and climbed on the big bed. Cas sat beside him and took his hand.

"We will go slow with this. There are certain rules. If you really want to do this with me." Cas seemed vulnerable, like he was asking if Dean really wanted to go through with this.

Dean blushed and said, "Cas... I want you. If I haven't proven that by now, I don't know what else to do. I never saw myself being with another man, but you.. you're special to me." Dean was bearing himself and Cas seemed to relax.

"I'm happy you feel that way Dean. When we first became friends, I was afraid that I'd only ever imagine this. But this," he pulled him into a kiss, "this is so very real. I can't wait to show you my world, all my lovely toys that come with it." Cas' smile grew dark and Dean shrank back a little. Cas noticed and laughed light heartedly, "I said we'd go slow. We will ease into it all. Are you staying?"

Dean looked at the clock and decided that it was better if he stayed, "Do you want me to move to the couch?" Cas shook his head and looked at him as if he had lost his mind. Cas shut the lights off and crawled under his covers. Dean laid on his back wondered if they were going to spoon or some shit like that. He couldn't believe what he had just done. He'd taken many showers with various females. None of them compared to this one. It was so much hotter than any of them. It was all because of Cas. Dean couldn't tell why he was so into him, but he wasn't going to question it. He fell asleep thinking of the way Cas looked when he was pushed around.

Cas watched Dean fall asleep from the other side of the bed. No one had ever affected him like Dean did. Dean could just look in his direction and he'd pitch a tent in his pants. It was a shame that it was purely physical for him. Damn his father and his emotional constipation.

 **P.s. - If you'd like to send me any suggestions, feel free. :)**


	11. Jesus' Middle Name is Henry

Dean felt the sunshine on his cheek. That's weird, because his room didn't have windows. He felt something on his chest. He peeled open his eyes and remembered he was in Castiel's room. And it was Cas that was on his chest. He had thrown himself over his chest and had been softly snoring into the crook of his neck. Dean didn't know what to do. He didn't want to wake him, he looked too peaceful for that.

Dean shifted to the side slightly and Cas was having none of it. He snuggled closer and mumbled something incoherant. Dean smiled and kissed his forehead. Cas' eyes flew open.

"Dean! I'm sorry. I didn't mean to invade your personal space again." He sat up quickly and Dean shook his head. He took hold of Cas' shoulders and pulled him back down. It was Cas's turn to feel awkward. He didn't know how to do the whole "spooning" thing. That required feelings that he wasn't capable of feeling, or so he thought. How had he ended up on Dean's chest last night? He remembers falling asleep on the other side of the bed.

"You asked me to trust you with your darkside. Trust me with mine. I may seem like a dick all the time, but I like to show the people that matter, exactly that. They matter."

"Are you sure I matter?" Cas voice had gone emotionless. Dean forced him to look at him.

"If you didn't matter I wouldn't be here. I would'nt fuck with you if I didn't care. But no chick flick moments. That's all I ask." Cas' eyes softened very slightly.

"The moments I have in mind, you won't find in a romance movie." His voice was filled with promise.

"That should not make me excited." Dean thought out loud.

"Oh, but it should. You should stop fighting the idea. Once you've fully accepted this, it'll be so much easier and more fun. Though, I'm sure last night you were having loads of fun." Dean blushed as he remembered how bold he had gotten in the shower. "That's actually the first time someone has pushed me around, or ordered me to do anything."

Dean grinned at him, "You liked it though."

"Oddly enough." Dean could feel the heat rolling off of Cas in waves. He was remembering exactly how much he'd liked it. Dean groaned low in his chest. He rolled Cas over onto his back and pinned his arms down by his side. "What are you doing?"

"Do you have to go in today? It's Saturday." Cas shook his head no and Dean grinned. "Good, I think I would like to have a lesson about agression. It can't be healthy for a relationship." Cas squinted his eyes at him, "Hey, you told me to stop thinking. This is me doing what feels right, right now."

In the blink of an eye Dean was face down on the bed. Cas was holding his head down and pulling his hands behind his back. He secured his hand with his knee. He leaned down to whisper in Dean's ear, "I can show you just how healthy agression can be. We will go over the rules a little later. Right now, I want you to fight back and show me what you've got."

Dean had never gotten rock solid hard so fast in his whole life. His cheeks went red from the heat spreading in his body. He felt his pulse in his fingers. He threw Cas sideways and freed himself so he could grab him. He picked him up put him up against the tall bed post, making him hug it and himself. Dean leaned down and whispered, "You're on." Cas chuckled and he pulled free. Spinning fast on his heel he took Dean by the throat and pushed him against the wall hard. Dean's head bounced from the impact but he liked the little tingling sensation it left.

Cas was two inches from his face and was leaning in slowly. He kissed him once and Dean bit Cas' lower lip. Cas hesitated for a split second. Dean took his chance and turned Cas. He shoved him face first into the wall where he had just been standing. He had Cas' hands behind his back. He pinned his lower body with his own and he deliberately placed his raging boner in Cas' hand.

Castiel was a little impressed with how quickly things had escelated. He squeezed his left hand slightly and heard Dean hiss, "You know you keep putting me on my stomach, I'm beginning to think you like me from this angle." Dean leaned down and nuzzled Cas' neck. He bit right at the base and Cas arched into the wall.

"I can't help it. Maybe you should do something about it." Cas was not used to being in the submissive role. He couldn't say he disliked it, but it was definitely different. Dean groaned and leaned into Cas. He was absentmindedly running his fingers along Dean's erection. Cas took this moment to turn slowly, keeping his hold on Dean and put his other hand around the back of his head. He pulled him into a kiss.

"JESUS HENRY CHRIST!" Both of their heads snapped towards the outburst. Bobby was standing in the doorway. He quickly turned around and went into the living room. Dean's stomach hit the floor. He was not ready for this.

"Bobby?!" He pulled away from Cas and went after him. Bobby's face was as red as a stop sign and he was pacing with his hands on his, looking up at the ceiling.

"When were you gonna tell me?" Bobby looked infuriated. This was exactly what Dean was afraid of.

"Bobby, listen. I don't know. This is all new. I.. I really don't know what to say. Stop looking so angry. Don't hate me Bobby." Dean was terrified and it showed. His whole body was quaking and his hands were fisted tightly as his sides.

Bobby looked confused for a second, "What the hell are you talking about, Boy? I don't hate you." Dean was still frozen. "Hey, I don't give a damn who you bumb uglies with. I wish I had known first, but I don't hate you. I did knock three times. I heard that someone was in here. I thought maybe you were.. fighting, or something, shit I don't know. I will never listen to... CHARLIE. I'm going to strangle that girl when I see her." Bobby was trying to ramble to cover his embarrassment. Dean walked over to him and hugged him tight.

"You don't think I'm a bitch? You don't hate me?"

"Son, it's gonna take more than a boyfriend for me to hate you. You're family. That's all that matters to me." Dean let go and looked at him in confusion now.

"What are you doing here?"

"I was looking for you. Lisa called the house and Sam didn't know where you were. So I called Charlie and she said to check here." Bobby looked him straight in the eye, "You are going to have one less girl in your life when I'm done with her." Dean shook his head and cursed Charlie for the second time in a week. "I came to tell you that she wants to set up a meeting later today. She has a proposition for you. Lisa, I mean." Bobby was already walking toward the door. Dean followed and hugged his father figure one last time.

"Thanks, Bobby. Oh, um... Dont... say anything to Sam. I need to tell him."

"I ain't barking up that tree. It's all yours." They said goodbye and Dean closed the door. He turned to find Cas right behind him.

"Who is Lisa?" Dean looked straight at the painting and smiled. It was time to tell him.

"Would you like to go to the meeting with me?"

"Yes." He looked a little irked to have his question pushed aside.

"Good." Dean leaned down and kissed him in earnest. He felt as though a great pressure had been taken off his shoulders. Cas kissed him back and then laid his head on Dean's chest.

"Your father was very kind."

"Bobby isn't my father." Dean stiffened and looked at the painting again. "He should've been though." Cas didn't want to press Dean for details. He would tell him about it if he wanted to on his own time. He felt a little guilty knowing he would never do the same. The father door was shut very tightly and dead bolted in place.


	12. He's My Boyfriend

**Author's Note: Hey guys, sorry I haven't been consistent, I've been pretty sick the last couple days. I'll do better now that I feel better. Keep reading and let me know what you think as we go. :)**

Lisa was sitting at the little round table outside the coffee shop reading a newspaper. Dean had opened his door and pointed her out.

"She's very pretty." Cas' words were clipped and Dean almost smiled. Castiel was jealous of Lisa because he thought she was an EX, or maybe someone Dean had been interested in. He would've corrected him, if he didn't want to surprise him.

"She is a lovely lady, yes." Dean took his elbow and muscled him around the front of the car since Cas looked as if he was just going to stand there staring at her.

"Dean, I've changed my mind. I don't want to be here." Cas was getting a look in his eye. A defiant look. One that Dean was sure he'd used once or twice before himself.

"Hey, listen. Do you trust me?" When Cas did nothing but stare at him he said, "She's not what you think. She's a really nice gal, if you'll give her the chance I'm sure you'll be fine." Cas reluctantly nodded, "Besides, this is a business meeting. There's no mixing business and pleasure." Cas smirked at that and straightened himself to full height and marched over with Dean beside him.

"Hey there, Dean. Oh! Mr. Novak! What a pleasant surprise. I wasn't aware that the two of you knew one another." She shook both of their hands and sat back down.

Cas was rigid in his seat, "Yes, I also wasn't aware that Dean knew you either." She glanced over at Dean who was relaxed in his chair and he waved it off.

"So, how have you been enjoying your painting?" Her smile was becoming a little forced the more that Cas stared at her. Cas felt Dean's hand on his knee as he squeezed. _Relax,_ was his message.

"I love it very much. Dean seems to admire it a lot as well." Her face showed her confusion.

"I would hope so.." She laughed a little awkwardly

"Why do you say that? Is there something I'm missing here?" Cas glanced at Dean and Dean couldn't hide the fact he was enjoying this.

"Well, Dean was the one painted it. I'm his vendor. I handle all his painting sales." You could see the wheels turn twice before it all clicked for Cas. He turned to Dean and glared at him.

"You painted my painting? You let me sit here and think I was talking to your female interest, so you could laugh?" Cas was losing the heat in his voice as the relief shone through his eyes.

"I saw that painting and I couldn't believe it. It was my favorite painting, and you chose it. Lisa is a friend and very much enjoys my work." Dean said calmly. He still had a small smile on his lips, "Up until very recently, my painting had been a secret. I told my family and I was going to tell you, but I thought this would be fun too. I'm sorry." Cas leaned back in his chair and addressed Lisa.

"What other works were Dean's? Is he very popular?"

"Well, all the ones in the open galla were his and a couple in the private viewing room were his. His work sells rather quickly. Except the one you bought. I had had it for a little while."

"So, does a lot of his works feature angels?" Cas looked over at Dean who looked to be in deep thought about something.

"No. It was just that one painting." Cas nodded and put his hand over Dean's and squeezed a little. It got his attention.

"So, Lis, what's doin'? Why the whole meeting scene?" Dean was close enough to Cas that he could lean back in his chair and touch shoulders. He enterlaced their fingers as Lisa started her explination.

"Well, my company is investing in another building in New York. We would like to feature your work as our opening artist. The store will be bigger and be right in the middle of an upperclass culture market. We would love to have a few of your larger paintings in the front windows and your own section of space in the open gallery," Dean's face lit up like a Christmas tree. He leaned foward in his chair and gripped Cas' hand harder.

"Lisa! That would awesome!" His face fell a little, "But wait, Bobby said there was a proposition. What's the catch?"

"Well, they want you to start signing your work. They want to set up an official portfolio. We've had a lot of requests to meet you and other deals, but since you're anonymous, we can't help you move forward." She crossed her arms and pursed her lips, "Oh, and they would like some new paintings for the opening. It's not for a couple of months, so you'd have time."

Dean sat and pondered for a moment then looked at Cas, "Dean, I think you should do it. I've seen your work. It's amazing. You could do this for a living. Especially if the New York store kicks off." Dean nodded and looked back at Lisa.

"Alright. I'll start the new paintings. I'll sign the old ones as well." Dean never signed them because his painting had been his secret. Now that everyone knows, there's no point in refusing.

They all sat back and talked excitedly about the new store and Dean got up to go get them all coffee.

"So, Castiel, how long have you and Dean known each other?" Lisa took Dean's absence as her chance to investigate.

"The day I bought the painting was the day our friendship was established." He smiled at the image of his painting in his mind.

"Wow, so when did you get together? If you don't mind me asking." She crossed her legs as if very interested.

"What? I mean, how did you know?" Cas felt nervous. What if she was interested in Dean and was checking to see if he was still available.

"The way he glances over at you. The suble smile you get when he does. You were holding hands under the able until he got up. I'm observant, it's kinda my job to be." She laughed light heartedly.

"It's very new. We are just establishing each other as a partner." Cas was blushing. He felt awkward talking about it with this woman.

"Well, you two make a very cute couple. I never knew Dean was into men though. It is a bit of a shock. That's beside the point." She waved her hand in the air as if to dismiss it.

Dean came back with the coffee and they reconviened, "Talk about me while I was away?" He'd meant it as a joke when Cas nodded, "Oh... Well, what did you say?" Dean took a drink of his coffee.

"How you're my boyfriend." Dean nearly sputtered his drink all over the table. Cas was looking at him with a bemused expression. Dean looked over at Lisa and she was smiling at him.

"Well, then. I won't leave again. Who knows what would come out next." Dean said as he blushed.

They talked for another half hour when Lisa had to leave to pick up her son Ben from football practice. They said their goodbyes and Lisa actually hugged Castiel.

"Let's go to the art store before we go back to your place." Dean said as he got into Baby with Cas.

"Sure. I have a lovely idea what your next painting should feature." Cas giggled as Dean blushed.


	13. That is Cruel

Dean and Castiel were surrounded by paint and brushes. Dean was avidly working on something he didn't want Cas to see yet. Cas was trying to subtley scoot around to see.

"Cas, get off my ass. I can't work if you keep making me move." He flicked a bit of paint at him.

"Oh, believe me Dean. You would know if I was anywhere near that perfect ass of yours." He got on all fours and crawled a little closer. Dean locked eyes with him and let his painting hand fall against his knee. They hadn't done anything involving penetration, but it made Dean nervous every time he thought about it. They had never really spoken about it either. Castiel continued to crawl towards him with a devious look in his shockingly blue eyes. Dean looked away and began painting with a quickness.

"Cas, if you keep distracting me, I will never get this done. I'm nearly done anyway." Cas sat back and huffed in impatience. It took Dean ten more minutes to finish the painting. "Ok, are you ready to see it?" Castiel went stick straight and nodded vigorously. Dean flipped the painting around and Cas lost all the air in his lungs.

The background of the painting was a mixture of purple and gray. In the foreground was a pair of hands extending upward. They were bound by cuffs that looked like they were connected to the corner the hands looked to be reaching to. It was a shadow, but it stood out as if it were painted in bright neon colors. Castiel couldn't stop looking at the painting. It was beautiful... and oddly arousing. Dean was smiling behind the painting as he watched Cas react to it.

Cas got up and took the painting. He put it on his dresser, right in the middle. Cas then beckoned for Dean to follow him onto the bed. He did as he was asked and sat on the end facing the headboard with his feet tucked under him. Castiel slinked up to him and took him by the face before gently kissing him. Dean seemed ready for it and pushed him back a little with his eagerness. Cas pulled back and shook his head.

"We are going to go over some of my rules now. Get off the bed and undress until you have nothing but your boxers on." Dean's stomach hit his feet. He slowly got off the bed and started taking off his clothes. He was looking at Cas the entire time, but Cas wasn't looking at his eyes. He was staring at his chest as he unbuttoned his shirt. He followed his hands with his gaze. Dean felt a streak of boldness and before he reached for the button on his jeans he ran his hand down his hardening length and smirked as Cas glared at him and waited for him to finish while adjusting himself on the bed. Dean finally got done with the undressing and got back up on the bed.

"Sit cross-legged in the middle of the bed." Cas decreed as he moved to make room. Dean did as he was told once more and felt his cheeks heat up. His cotton boxers were doing nothing to hide the fact he was turned on.

Cas sat behind him and removed his own shirt. Dean was getting nervous and twitchy when he finally heard the next command, "You will not react to anything I do unless given permission to do so. I don't want one sound, or major movements. Understand?" Dean affirmed his understanding and then asked why. "It teaches you discipline, and it pleases me to see you strive to do as you're told. God complex, remember? Now, sit straight, look forward. No reaction. If there is one I will have to find a way to punish you." Dean was curious as to what that would be, but he wanted to be good.

Cas slid his hand straight up Dean's spine. The muscles tightened and goosebumps formed all along his back. He drew his hand across his shoulders. He used his nails to lightly scratch across the tops of the muscles of his shoulders. Dean was doing very well until Cas bent down and bit the base of his neck, where it meets the shoulder. It was a very sensitive place. Dean couldn't hide the fact he had made a noise.

"You were doing so well Dean." Cas moved to sit in front of him. He glanced down and took in the sight of Dean fully erect and straining against his thin boxers. He made eye contact and Dean lunged forward. He wrestled with Cas for a bit, trying to establish the dominant position, but he failed. He was face down on the bed with Cas sitting on his hands behind his back. Cas turned and full handedly smacked Dean on the ass.

"Whoa!"

"That's for reacting." He did it a second time with a little more force, "And that is for trying to take my role."

"Ah, c'mon sweet cheeks, I couldn't help it. You know me, always trying to please you. I know you like it when I push you around."

"Well, you aren't much of a fight." Insulted, Dean bucked up against Cas and pulled him down. He had him on his back while lifting himself up with his arms. Cas' legs came up and wrapped around Dean's waist. Dean lowered himself and rubbed back and forth against Cas. He watched as Cas inhaled sharply.

"I will not be tolerant of outbursts like this."

"What are you gonna do?" That was the wrong thing to ask someone with expierience. Cas squinted his eyes and his hand shot down between their bodies. He took ahold of Dean and he smiled when his partner squeezed his eyes shut. He started stroking. Dean moaned in the back of his throat. It was gutteral and deep. Cas reveled in the sound. He gently pushed Dean over onto his back and kept stroking him as he kissed him. Dean's breathing was getting faster with each downward pull. Their tongues began to battle one another and Cas bit Dean's lip as he squeezed a little harder.

Dean arched off the bed. No one had ever worked him like this. No female had ever taken the time. It was fantastic. Cas knew just what to do to drive Dean crazy. He was slowly sliding his boxers off at the same time. When Cas pulled back from the kiss he removed the fabric swiftly. Dean laid there naked and breathing heavy. He didn't have time to feel self conscious because he looked down and locked eyes with Cas as he slid both palms up the inside of his thighs. Dean's dick twitched when Cas' hands came into contact.

Their stares were locked as Cas leaned forward and licked the very tip of him. It was a quick flick of his tongue, but it set Dean's blood on fire. Every drop pooled into his erection and Cas went to work. He took him into his mouth and made sure to let his spit slide down so he could move his hand freely. Dean's breath was eractic and he couldn't seem to catch it. He balled his fists in the sheets and pulled. Cas' mouth was the best feeling he's ever felt. Cas licked and sucked in just the right rhythm that Dean could already feel his release building. Cas went a little faster and he felt Dean's legs tense beneath him.

All of a sudden, on the brink of cumming, Cas pulls away and stops everything.

"NO!" Dean writhes on the bed for a few seconds as his release dies down and the feeling of unsatisfaction sets in.

"Don't challenge me Dean. I will always win." Cas smirked as he climbed back on top of Dean.

"You are evil. That is cruel."

"That is fair punishment. Challenge me and I will show you just what I will do." He nuzzled his neck and kissed his jaw, "Now... are you ready for me to finish what I started?" Dean inhaled deeply and hesitantly nodded, "Ask me nicely."

"Will you please finish?" Dean couldn't meet Cas' eyes.

"What do you want me to do specifically?" Cas was trailing his tongue down Dean's neck and down the center of his broad chest.

"Ah.. I.."

"Do you want to cum, Dean?"

"Yes." Dean's face was burning.

"Say it."

"I.. Want you to make me cum. Please."

Castiel smiled, "Mmmm, I love it when you are a good boy, and soon you will too." Cas went back down and resumed his work. Dean was grunting and panting while his muscles tensed up and he knew Cas literally had him by the balls. It was one of the hottest things he's ever experienced. Cas let his hand do the work as he bent down and bit the place where Dean's thight met his groin.

As he felt Cas' teeth combined with the pressure of his hand, Dean felt himself explode. He came so hard stars shot across his vison. He growled Castiel's name. Dean felt Cas get off the bed, but he kept his eyes closed. He needed to control his ragged breathing and heartbeat. A minute went by and he felt soemthing touch him. He was now hypersensitive and looked up. Cas was cleaning him off with a small hand towel. He had a small satisfied smile on his face and he looked sweet.

Dean jacked up off the bed and grabbed Cas' face. He looked into his eyes for a second and kissed him gently. His lips were slightly swollen and red from the blowjob he just gave.

"That was repayment for my painting." Cas' voice was soft and deep.

"I'll paint a hundred more, if you'd like." Dean smiled as Cas blushed and laughed. They kissed softly again.

"Come lay with me. Let's watch a movie." Cas pulled him into the living room and grabbed a blanket. Dean stretched out on the couch, still fully naked. Cas eyed him and threw a pair of sweats out of the bedroom on his lap. Dean chuckled, no longer feeling self conscious about his nakedness. Cas went to the TV and popped in _A Knight's Tale_. He stretched out next to Dean with his back against his chest. Dean snuggled up close and wrapped his big arms around him. Cas felt safe and something else he didn't readily recognize.

As the story of William was told, Cas drifted off the sleep. For the first time in his life he willingly fell asleep in the arms of someone else.


	14. Emotional Constipation

Gabirel knew that Dean was at Castiel's apartment because his car was here. He knew that he should not walk in, because Lord knows what he'd walk in on. Buuuuuut, he was nosy and loved a good surprise, so he went on up anyway. He open the door quietly. He stopped and listened, but he only heard soft snoring. It was still in the early morning, so he wasn't too surprised. Gabe tip toed to the living and stopped at the sight before him.

His little brother was cushioned on top of Dean's chest with his hands resting right above the guy's heart. Like he'd been feeling his heart beat as he slept. Dean was smiling in his sleep. He had one arm slung loosly around Cas. It was a lovely sight to behold. Gabriel had never seen his little brother so content. So naturally he whipped out his phone and took multiple pictures from different angles. Gabe then decided that he could do a nap. He had been up all night fighting with his other brother. Michael was again trying to get him to return home and be the good son to a father who was long gone. He laid down on Cas' big bed. The black duvet was the most comfortable thing Gabriel could think of.

/

Dean woke up first. He had never felt so well rested. He looked down at Cas. The way the sunlight was playing across his face made him look magical. Dean froze. Why was he taking the time to notice? Why did he enjoy that so much? _NO. Fuck off, Brain._ Dean thought to himself.

He'd never been in love, but he knew it didn't happen this God damned fast. He shook his head and closed his eyes again. Cas shifted his knee and was now crushing Dean's left nut. Trying to hold back his whining, he tried to move Cas without shifting too much. Cas was obviously not satisfied because he then began mumbling in his sleep. His face scrunched up and he clung to Dean's shoulders. Dean let out a breath of relief and pain. Thankfully in the midst of mumbling Cas had straightened his legs back out.

Dean was just laying there, ready to wait as long as necessary for Cas to wake up. He started thinking about the night before. It didn't take long before he was hot and bothered.

"Calm the fuck down." He whispered to himself. Cas' eyes flew open. He didn't move but he stiffened. Dean started to rub his back, but Cas moved away and stood up.

"Ahem, sorry. I don't know why I feel the need to use you as my personal pillow." Dean felt a prick of hurt at his words. Cas must have seen that becasue he cursed and leaned down to kiss him. Dean took him and pulled him down on top of him again.

"Stop thinking about it. I like being your pillow." Cas sighed in frustration. He was so conflicted and he had no idea as to what he was fighting with himself about. He knew that Dean had formed an emotional attachment. That's not what bothered him. He had this funny feeling in his gut that he couldn't name. It irritated him. He's never felt it before and he didn't like it. The only time it happened was when he was with Dean.

"Dean... I..." Dean's hand had begun sliding up and down his back. It was really nice.

"Cas. You mean something to me. I want to show you that."

"You showed me last night. When you obeyed me."

"I want to show it to you without being turned on. It's what people do. The sex stuff is great, but you need other things, little things, to show you too."

"I don't know how to show you with little things Dean. So I don't expect you to."

"What do you mean?" Dean's voice was taking on a wary tone.

"Dean... I don't want you to get your hopes up." Dean shifted Cas off of him and sat up to look at him.

"About what. You are my... boyfriend. I'm supposed to care about you. I'm supposed to want to make you happy. And you're supposed to return that. It's a two way street Cas."

Cas stared at Dean with a sadness in his eyes. He knew what Dean was saying was true, but he also knew he wasn't capable of returning the level of feelings being given.

"Stop looking at me like I'm some god damn lost puppy!" Dean shot up off the couch. "Are you telling me you don't feel anything for me? Are you saying that I'm just some sex toy for you to play with?"

Cas was silent for a minute, "I care what happens to you Dean. You matter, but what you're asking is impossible. I haven't had an emotional attachment since my father left."

"What do you mean? What did he do?"

Castiel stood up and started walking toward the kitchen, "I don't talk about this."

"The hell you say. I want to know why you say you can't feel anything for me."

"He was an awful parent. That's all you need to know." Cas' voice was short and curt.

Dean's feelings were hurt, but he'd never say so. Why would Cas involve him if he knew he wouldn't love him? Was it because Dean isn't good enough? Did he think that he was too low on the social bar to be able to recieve his feelings? Woud his father think him too beneath them for them to be together?

"You're really something else Castiel. Once you decide whether I'm worth your time or not, let me know." Dean turned and stormed out of the apartment. The slam of the door rang on after silence had fallen. Cas let his head fall. He didn't know why he wanted to vomit, but the urge wa there. He was all of a sudden really angry, not with Dean, but with himself. Why did he have to be the cold hearted bastard Dean had just made him feel like? Dean was important to him. Why couldn't he just say that?

"Because, it's not the same. It's not equal." He answered himself out loud.

"That's a load of bullshit, lil bro." Cas jumped and whirled around.

"Gabriel? Where the hell did you come from?"

"Same place you did, but that hole is not the one you need to be worrying about. You need to worry about the one you just dug with a quickness. I'm actually impressed. I've never seen somone steam roll themselves so fast."

"He wants me to love him, Gabriel."

"I don't see the problem, Cas" Gabe leaned against the door frame and crossed his arms. Cas shot him a hard look. "Cas, you need to get this chip off your shoulder. I saw you two. You really care about him. You trust him too. Otherwise you would not be where you are right now. You're angry with yourself for hurting his feelings. Which is what you did by the way. Did you see the look in his eye when you wouldn't open up to him?"

"Of course I did, Gabriel. Why did Father choose me? Why was I the one he had to cripple like this?" Tears were forming in Cas' eyes.

"You were the most defiant. You had to be made an example of." Gabirel walked up to his little brother and took him by the shoulders, "This is not a cripple. This is emotinal constipation; just like normal constipation, it will pass. The blockage will break free and you will have so many emotions you won't know how to handle yourself. You already feel something. I saw it on your face, right before you woke up." Cas was just staring at his brother. He knew Gabriel was right, but he had no intentions of letting go of his block, because who wants to feel all the pain you've kept at bay? Cas knew it would end his relationship with Dean eventually, but he could'nt risk losing his composer. It was too important to him. It was the one thing his father couldn't strip him of.

Castiel really took a good look at his brother for the first time since the beginning of the arguement, "Gabiel, you look like someone hit you with a truck."

"You've always had a way with words. Michael was badgering me all night last night. I'm just tired. Which is why I came here. I wanted to talk and sleep." Gabe walked back to the bedroom. Cas followed so he could shower.

"Feel free to sleep as long as you like."

"Thanks, Bro." Gabe flopped down and was asleep before Cas was done undressing. He didn't know what he was going to say to Dean.

Lord help them both if he chose to keep Dean.


	15. The Eyes of an Angel

It was the next day, and Dean had driven back and forth between their houses. He finally got out of baby in front of Cas' apartment. He hadn't been able to sleep at all. It had his mind whirling every since he left. Dean couldn't believe that he'd been so damn blind. What the hell was he thinking? He was pacing in front of his car in a rage. He knew that he shouldn't have gotten his hopes up. He really hadn't meant to, but that was the thing about feelings. You can't tell them what to do.

"I should leave." Dean was talking to himself, "Why can't I get in the car?" He put his hands on his hips and growled in frustration. "Get in the car Dean." He kept trying to tell himself, but alas he couldn't move. He wanted to go yell at Cas. He wanted to yell at him an call him a stupid asshole, and some more shit. But all of that was just bluster, what he really wanted was for Cas to come down those steps and say he didn't mean it. That he feels the same way Dean does.

He didn't know what to do. He wanted to leave, but he wanted to stay. He stopped and made up his mind. He turned and marched right back up the stairs. He stopped at the door and about turned around to leave instead. He was losing his temper, and he was beginning to think that it was a hopeless case.

Suddenly a vision flashed before Dean's eyes. Cas looking at him like he was honey, just waiting to tasted. The way Cas looked when he snuggled up next to him on the couch. The way he wiggled back into the dent Dean made with his own body. The way Cas has a tendancy to fall asleep on his chest. He knew that Cas felt something, and it was other than just his sex drive.

Dean threw open the door to see Gabriel holding his little brother against his shoulder. He couldn't move. He was slightly jealous that Gabe got to hold him, but he was astounded to see Cas crying. Cas looked at him, and all of the air left Dean. He looked into those red-rimmed crystal blue eyes. He saw years of suffering through the eyes of an angel.

Cas pulled away from his brother and walked towards Dean. He stopped when he got right in front of him. He stared up at him while the tears just rolled down his cheeks. Dean didn't want to move to fast, in fear Cas would shut down or run. He slowly brought his hands up to cup his face. Cas leaned into his hand just the slightest. Dean brought Cas' face and craddled him against his shoulder. Cas crumpled and Dean caught him. He pulled him into his lap and rocked back and forth.

Dean stroked Cas' messy hair. He kissed his cheek and held on tight. Cas really unleashed then. He was full blown crying in Dean's arms. He didn't care either; Dean cared about him, and that's all that mattered right now. Cas gripped onto Dean's leather jacket and pushed his face into his shoulder as the sobs racked his chest.

Cas had been bottling all the hurt and disappointment up inside without a release for so long. He didn't know what to do to slow his hysterics. It was unsensible to cry like this. He was a grown man. He felt Dean kiss his cheek. It made his chest ache more, but when the ache stopped it was replaced with a warm feeling. He could feel Dean stroking his hair. It made his eyes burn more with renewed tears, but when the flow slowed he felt his breath come back.

With each kiss and stroke he felt his heart beat slow and his hiccuping breath return to normal. He didn'tknow if Dean was angry or if he just wanted to leave. He didn't care though, so he wrapped his arms around his neck and held on tightly. He didn't want to let go. He cared about him. So much it had thrown him into a hysteria when he slammed the door. He was so conflicted on the inside that he needed a catalyst to help him show the emotions he kept burried.

He felt Dean move and he thought that he was getting up to leave, and he panicked, "You're important. You are worth it. I was wrong." Dean froze and Cas felt him inhale deeply. He felt him move to get up again, but Dean had brought him up with him. He was carrying him. He felt a kiss on his forehead and Dean's arms wrap tighter.

He heard Dean talking to Gabriel, but he had no idea as to what he said. He was all of a sudden very tired. The emotional outburst has completely drained him. Dean laid him on his bed very gently. He looked up at Dean and noticed his shirt was soaked.

"I'm sorry, I got your shirt wet." His voice was rough and it cracked at the end.

"My shirt will be fine. You can soak as many as you want, as long as you talk to me." He leaned down and kissed his lips softly, "I will be back a little later. I have something I have to take care of."

"Where are you going? Please don't go. I'm sorry that I was being stupid earlier." He lifted himself up and grabbed onto Dean's hand. Dean smiled a little and caressed his cheek.

"I won't be gone long."

"What are you gonna do?" Cas was slowly fading into a sleepy haze.

"I'm going to tell Sammy."

Cas laid back and smiled, "That is good. I know he will be happy. He's a good kid. My brother knew before I did." He laughed a little. He was drifting off to sleep when Dean walked back out into the living room.

"Gabe, I will be back sometime tonight. He's gonna need some rest." Dean felt a coviction inside like no other. It felt wrong to keep this from Sam any longer.

"I will stay until you get back." Gabriel got up and clasped Dean on the shoulder, "I want to thank you, for the way you treated Cas. I know he's not the easiest person to get along with, but you... you really care about him. That shows through everything that just happened. I've never seen him cry before. Not even when Dad was still here. Thank you Dean." Dean felt his throat get tight.

"I think I love him Gabriel, and it pisses me off. He could change his mind and tell me to kick rocks at any minute." Dean was shaking a little.

"Now that the flood gates are open, and the way they were broke free, there's no chance that that could happen. He cares about you a lot, he may even love you. There's no going back for him." Dean hugged Gabirel and walked out to his Baby. It was time to either make or break his relationship with his little brother.


	16. The News

Dean sat in the front seat of his car for longer than necessary. He was no looking forward to this at all. He'd much rather shoot himself in the foot than see his little brother resent him. He gripped the streering wheel and breathed deeply.

He could do this. Bobby didn't hate him, why would Sam? He tried to reason with himself, but no matter what he said, all he could see was Sam scorning him with his eyes. He could see him turning away in disgust. This was the most awful thing Dean had ever felt.

He picture Cas falling into him, crying on his shoulder because he didn't want to lose Dean over emotional trauma. He was strong enough to let all his feelings and pain show, so Dean will be strong enough to tell Sammy. He has to, for Cas. It's not fair to keep him a secret. And Dean didn't want to hide him. He wants to show the world what an awesome person Cas was and that he was his.

A knock sounded on the window, making Dean jump. He looked up to see Sam. He rolled down the window, "You've been sitting here for half an hour. If you rub the steering wheel anymore it will tear the leather." He looked concerned, and all Dean could was grunt.

Dean cleared his throat, "Let's go for a drive." Sam got in on the passenger side, then turned to Dean when he didn't pull away.

"What's going on Dean? What's wrong? You look like someone stole the last piece of apple pie and someone keyed your car. And quite honestly you look constipated as well. It's not a good look for you." Dean knew his little brother was trying to get him out of his funk, but he couldn't focas on it. "Dean, where are we going?"

He looked around and realized he was subconsciously driving towards Charlie's place. "We are gonna talk. Charlie can help me."

"Dean you are starting to worry me. What the hell is up?" Dean pulled the car over and just sat and looked at Sam.

"I... I don't want you to hate me." Dean's breathing was shallow. He felt as though he was trying to swallow a golfball.

"What are you talking about?" Sam was so confused he rubbed the back of his neck.

Dean steeled himself and tried to take a deep breath, "I have a boyfriend..." He held his breathe for what seemed like a lifetime before Sam replied.

"What?" His face morphed from confusion to disbelief. He straightened himself in his seat.

Dean began to panic when he narrowed his eyes, "I have a boyfriend, and I might love him. We've not had the relationship very long. This is new thing for me, and I felt that it was wrong to keep it a secret from you. I don't want you to hate me." Dean was trying to ramble, but he was running out of things to say. He almost didn't want to give Sam the chance to speak.

"Who?" Dean couldn't tell if it was disdain or blunt curiousity in his voice.

"... Castiel..." Dean began to sweat. Sam's eyes widened, but he didn't say anything. "Sammy?"

"How long?" Sam looked as if he was relaxing.

"About a month. Give or take." When he saw Sam visibly relax, his own heartbeat began to slow a little.

"Dean, why would you think I would hate you? Just because you're gay, or bisexual, or whatever, doesn't change the fact you're my big brother. It doesn't change the fact I love you. And only because it's Castiel do I feel the least bit slighted at being kept in the dark. I look up to him, just as I look up to you." Dean let his breath go. He felt the weight leave his chest as his little brother made his heart swell. He would never things like that though because nobody in their right mind likes a chick flick moment.

"Sammy..."

"Whoa, no. You stop right there, don't think you're scott free. Who all knows?" Sam sat forward with squinted eyes. He had a major bitch face going.

"Charlie, Bobby, and Gabriel. Oh and Lisa too." Dean looked down sheepishly and started fiddling with the radio. He found his station and Def Leppard was playing. He tried to focus on the lyrics as Sam looked at him with mock anger.

"Your art vendor knew before me?!" Dean nodded and started whistling the song. Sam punched him in the arm. Dean looked over at him.

"Bitch!"

"Jerk!"

They both burst out laughing. The tension was completely gone and Dean ruffled Sam's hair. He pulled off again still heading to Charlie's. Maybe his favorite little lesbian could give him some tips. That and he wanted to tell her all about the last two days.

* * *

Cas was in his father's home. Everything was that awful off white his dad was so fond of. The only splash of color was a red stain in the middle of the carpet. He went to go investigate it. All of a sudden his hands were bound and he was in imense pain. He was shirtless, kneeling over the blood stain on the carpet. It was his blood. it was coming from the various open lacerations on his face.

Cas looked up into the eyes of his father and saw the pure hatred. The voice that followed the look was deep and booming, just as Cas' own voice was, but it had a cruel undertone to it, "You are not worthy. You are rebellious and disobediant. You have too many emotions. You are weak." Another blow landed on Cas' face and it kicked his head to the side.

"Why are you doing this to me? All I ever wanted was your love. All I seeked was your aproval of me." Cas' voice was hoarse, as if he'd been screaming.

"How could I love such a worthless son? You can't follow the simplest commands. You are what? A lawyer? You try to help people? You can't even help yourself. How could anyone love you." Out of nowhere his father yelled in pain. Dean was behind him. He had struck him in the shouder with a blade of some kind. He whirled around the father to Cas so he could cut him free.

Cas panicked, "NO! Dean, get out of here. He will hurt you!" Dean wasn't listening to him. His father was now coming towards Dean with a fury in his eye.

"You can't save him. He is beyond your reach. He is still mine." His dad lashed out at Dean and launched him across the open space into the wall. Cas yelled and pleaded for him to focus on himself again.

"Leave him alone! It's me who deserves this, not him!" His father wasn't paying any attention to him anymore. He picked Dean's unconscious body up by his throat. His feet came off the ground and he came to and began to struggle. Cas' vision went red. He was so infuriated his father would lay a hand on him.

The scene changed as Cas threw his father to the ground. "How dare you touch me!" Cas grew in physical size as his anger grew.

"You have no power over me anymore. You left. You aren't real." His father tried to stand but Cas' words kept him down. "You will leave me in peace. You are nothing but a bad memory. You left, and I refuse to hold back anything anymore because I was never good enough for you." Cas watched as the image of his father went up in smoke. He turned back towards the wall to find the scene had changed.

He was no longer bleeding or in pain. What lay before him was beautiful. Dean was on his stomach, his hands folded underneath his cheek. He peeked up at him from under his lashes and smiled. Cas was straddling his back. He leaned down and began to rub Dean's shoulders.

"Dean." His name was just a breath but he felt as though it spoke volumes.

Cas' eyes drifted open. He'd never had a nightmare go that well. looked at the clock and it said six o' clock. He'd slept most of the day away. He wondered where Dean was. He hoped everything had gone well with Sam.

He got up and wondered to the kitchen. Gabe was watching some animal planet documetary on his couch, "You haven't left?"

"I told your lover boy I'd stay till he got back. Have you seen the news? There was supposedly a shooting at an auto shop. Three people were killed." Gabriel was talking around a sucker.

"That's horrible. People are disgusting sometimes." Cas felt sad at the loss of life. He was slightly glad he didn't have friends to worry about. He idly wondered about the families of the people killed. He solemly made a cup of tea so he could join Gabe on the couch.

He was thinking about Dean, which lead him to think about his family, "Oh Jesus." Cas quickly ditched the cup and hot water as he ran to his laptop, "What new channel did you see that on?"

"Uh, I don't remember. It was a couple of hours ago. But I do remember they said that one of the people killed was the shop owner." Cas' stomach was twisting as he brought up every news site he knew. He was praying with all his might.

Lord let him be wrong.


	17. Personal Hell

Dean and Sam were having a great time just chilling with Charlie. She was teasing the older brother about his description of the first kiss. Dean watched Sam for any kind of negative reaction to anything he said. He couldn't help himself. Things just didn't go this well for him. He was happy with his boyfriend. He had an accpeting family who loved him. He had a great job that he loved. What else could he ask for.

Suddenly both Charlie and Dean's phones went off at the same time. Dean got up to get his from his jacket pocket on the hook by the door. Charlie ran to the kitchen to escape Sam's nosy ears.

"Hello?" He hadn't recognized the number calling.

"Is this Dean Winchester?"

"Yes. Who is this?" The emotionless tone of the accented voice on the other side of the line put him on edge.

"This is Dr. Crowley. I am the mortician at Roanoke Memorial Hospital."

Dean's stomach hit the floor and he broke into a sweat, "Uh, Okay. Why are you... What's going on? Why are you calling me?"

"We have a body here that has you listed as the next of kin. We need you to come identify and claim the body."

Dean couldn't believe what he was hearing. He listed all the people who could possibly be gone and none of them seemed possible. He was so afraid that this Crowley guy was going to say that Castiel had had an accident. That he needed to come claim his dead boyfriend. "Who." That was the only word he could manage. His throat was closing with dread and he was squeezing the phone so hard he heard it creak a little.

The man on the phone said the one name Dean couldn't truly believe.

Dean fell to his knees. He let the phone clatter to the floor. Sam jumped up and raced to Dean's side. Dean was staring at Sam. He started shaking his head. No, this couldn't be right. This couldn't be real.

"Dean?! What's going on?" Sam grabbed his shoulders as he hit his own knees in front of his big brother who absolutely never cried. He didn't cry for anyone or anything, but Dean was silently crying. He was just staring at him. Sam shook his shoulders a little, "C'mon Dean, talk to me. You're scaring me."

Charlie came slowly stubling from the kitchen. Her hand was over her mouth in horror and her eyes were filled with unshed tears. Sam was glancing between the two, "Can some damn body tell me what the hell is going on?!"

"Sammy... we need to go to the hospital. I will explain on the way." Sam stood up and backed away from Dean.

"What do you mean? What's happened?" Dean got up and grabbed his jacket and started walking to the impala. Everyone got in silently. Sam had a sense of dread the closer they got to the edge of town. Dean was driving like a bat out of hell.

* * *

Castiel and Gabriel were driving as fast as the traffic would allow. It was six thirty rush hour. The news sites had given a hospital location and Gabe hadn't asked any questions when Cas said they had to leave. Castiel was so worried about Dean was almost physically sick twice. He hoped that when he got threre Dean and the rest of his family didn't mind his intrusion. He had to see Dean though.

They pulled in about fifteen minutes later. He spotted the Impala and was lucky enough to find a spot two cars over. He threw his car in park and was rushing to the doors. He didn't even care if Gabe was coming or not. Cas rushed through the automatic door and went straight for the info desk until he saw Sam standing with Dean and Charlie who were just meeting up with Ellen and Jo.

He walked up to them and Sam said, "Cas. How did you...?"

"I saw the news report. I came straight here. I wasn't sure, but I now fear that I was right." His voice was shaking as he looked at Dean. He looked so visably shaken, Cas' heart was breaking. Before he could speak to him a man walked up and talked directly to Dean.

"You must be the Winchesters. I need, " he looked at his clipboard, "Dean and Ellen." He had an accent and eyes that showed just how little he cared for his job. He turned and walked away with the two of them following behind. Ellen took Dean's hand and he saw him fist his other hand.

Cas turned to see Sam holding Charlie and Jo was rubbing Sam's back. This is was a family looked like in a tragedy. They were here for each other and none judged another's emotions. Cas got choked up and stood with his back against the wall next the trio.

* * *

"The male was killed by a single bullet wound to the frontal lobe." Crowley said as the elevator door opened to a pristine floor. They went through some opaque sliding automatic doors that revealed a morgue.

"How can you sound so dead, saying things like that?" Ellen looked over at him in disbelief.

"I'm the king of people's personal Hell, ma'am. You have to be desensitized."

Dean had moved away from the talking pair to look at the body on a metal table in front of him. He felt his heart shatter. One of his worst fears had been realized at the happiest point in his life.

Bobby lay under the bright white sheet that was folded down to his shoulders. He had a black hole just slightly right of center on his forehead. Dean felt everything drain out of him. Every emotion he had before was gone. He felt very numb.

"Ellen. It's him." Ellen inhaled sharply as she grabbed onto Dean's shoulder. She began sobbing as she went up to him and stroked his cheek. Dean backed away and looked at Crowley, "Where is his stuff?" The doctor handed him a small box with a baseball cap, a silver flask, and a wallet on top of folded jeans and button up, "Ellen, can you take Sammy home? I'm sure he will need you." She turned and nodded.

"He will need his big brother, Dean."

"I will be there. I can't stay here right now. I'm losing my marbles and I need some space." He turned and took the stairs instead of waiting for the elevator. He reached the lobby again and walked up to Sam.

"It was him, wasn't it." Sam's voice cracked and he held on to Charlie and little harder.

"Yes, Sammy. I've got to get some air. I will be back to the house tonight. I promise." Sam nodded and he let go of Charlie so he could pull his big brother into a tight hug. They held onto each other for a bit before Dean pulled back and took the hat out of the box. He turned to leave then. Cas had stepped behind him when he hugged Sam so he could talk to him, but he lost his voice when he saw the very dead expression in Dean's eyes. Dean glanced at him for a second and shook his head, "Go home." He pushed past him and walked to his car.

For the first time Castiel didn't want to follow Dean. He was afraid. Cas recognized the dead look. He'd worn it for so long himself it was impossible to mistake. Gabriel put his hand on his shoulder.

"Let him have his space. He will come to you when he's ready."

"Is that what I looked like?" Cas couldn't look away from the doors Dean had exited from.

"Cas..."

"Answer me." His voice going deeper as his emotions began to take over.

"Yes." Gabriel made his little brother look at him, "You can't help someone who doesn't want help."

"I can't just leave him to wallow in his own misery. That's what my family did. Look how that worked for me." Gabe took the stab hard and swallowed a couple of times.

"I'm sorry Cas. I'm so sorry that I left you behind." Gabe moved his hands up his neck and held his face, "I'm sorry I was too afraid of our father to stand up to him when he punished you. I'm sorry I wasn't strong enough to help you." Cas looked at him for a minute and laid his forehead against his big brother's shoulder. Gabe kept one hand on the back of Cas' head.

"I won't let him be by himself. He needs me."

"We will go home for now. You can call him tomorrow." Cas agreed and he turned to Sam.

"I'm so sorry, Sam."

"Thank you Castiel. Dean just needs some space. He will come around."

"Thank you." Cas and Gabe left shortly after Dean's departure. Cas could tell this was going to be the longest night of his life.


	18. Jack Is Not My Friend

Dean sat on the hood of the Impala. He had half a bottle of jack left. He couldn't decide what he was feeling. His range of emotions were shooting in all directions. He was holding Bobby's hat tightly in one shaking hand and the bottle in the other. He had parked at the only field in the county. It had one lone tree in the middle of it and tall grass surrounding it all. This was his spot he went to when he needed to be alone.

Dean was crying and he hated it. He didn't cry when his father had died, but Bobby had meant so much more. Bobby had been there for him. He was the one Dean looked to when he had no idea what to do, or when he needed help with Sam. He was finally happy and now God had played the cruelest card he possesed.

Dean jumped down from the hood and wobbled as he steadied himself. He was so angry and hurt. He looked down at the hat in his hand and felt it all boil up and spill over. He took a long swig from his bottle and he stared at it after he let it drop back down. His anger coming to a peak; Dean threw the bottle and it shattered as it hit the tree. Dean yelled up at the sky. He had no words, but he hoped that his voice had been heard and realized. He wanted the sick son of a bitch who took his real father from him to hear him. He hoped that God shuttered at this moment because He knew what Dean's thoughts were.

After his voice had given out, Dean hit his knees. He no longer had the will or energy to stand anymore. His phone went off in his pocket. He looked at the screen and just tossed it to the side. No way was he letting Sam hear him like this. The phone rang three times after the first call. There was a break in the ringing. After five minutes of just laying in his numbness, looking up at the sky, and contemplating getting another bottle from his front seat, the phone went off again. Dean was so irritated with it that he answered it without looking for who it was first.

"Sam, stop calling me. I will be home." He hung up and put his head on his knees. The ground was beginning to spin while he was sitting still. A minute went by and his phone went off again.

"God damn it, What?!" He answered this time.

"Dean?" It wasn't Sam.

"I told you to go home."

"I am home Dean. Sam called me because he's worried. He doesn't know where you are. Why is your voice so hoarse? And... are you drunk?"

"I'm fine." Dean tried to get up, but the world around went into warp speed and he fell. When he put his hand down to catch himself it hit the shards of glass and he felt it slice open his palm. He couldn't feel the pain. "Damn it. Look, Cas, I've gotta go.. I flumped up my head."

"You what?"

"I hurt my damn hand, not my head. I can't get up though. I'm fine. Leave me alone." Dean was rambling to himself. He inched away from the glass and layed down. He was so drunk that he was having trouble keeping his eyes open, but if he didn't the world would do the cha cha and he'd get nauseous.

"Dean, tell me where you are."

"No! This is my place. Leave me alone! I don't want to talk to you. I just want to drink and scream some more. I'll go home later." Dean sat up slowly and hung up while Cas was talking. He looked down at his hand. There was a decent cut on the meaty part of his thumb. It wasn't too bad, and the bleeding had slowed. _It'll be ok._ Dean thought to himself. He started thinking about Cas. He felt bad for hanging up on him, but he was angry. Didn't he understand that?

Why couldn't people just let him be angry. He wanted pie. He brought his hand up to wipe his face, but it was a bit too fast and he ended up slapping himself on the forehead. Dean didn't think he'd ever been this drunk. He couldn't really feel anything anymore. Hell, he didn't even feel angry. Now he really felt bad for hanging up on Cas. He loved him. Dean couldn't play himself anymore. But he didn't feel the love at the moment. It was just a swimming thought that happened to cross his frontal lobe the most often.

The phone rang again.

"Dean, listen to me."

"I didn't even say hello, Cas. You know.. for an angel.. you're ruuude. Casttel." Dean slurred his name so badly Castiel laughed a little.

"I'm not an angel Dean. Now please tell me where you are." Cas' voice was deep and it was straining, as if he wanted to yell at him.

"You're my angel..." Dean made a disgusted sound, "Ugh, that sounded so gay. I don't care though. Which is weird. I'm the butch one. I should care." Dean was slowing rocking so he could try to get up. He stood up and very carefully walked to the car.

"Dean." Cas snapped, he had reached his tolerance level, "Where are you?"

"You gonna come N' get me?" He flattened himself on the hood. He loved this car.

"I would like to. Yes." Dean could picture Cas' angry face. He laughed becuase he thought it was cute.

"Are you gonna beat me up?"

"No... Dean, just tell me where you are."

"Aww. But I wanna fight. Let's fight."

"For Shit's sake DEAN! Where ARE you!" Cas lost all patience.

"I'm at my feeeild. The one with the tree. It's beside Bobby's..." Dean stopped and stood up. He'd forgotten why he had come here. Bobby. He was so drunk he forgot that shit had hit the fan, "Cas. Call Sam. He knows. He can tell you. I need to get in my car."

"Dean, don't drive. I'm on my way to get you. Don't leave. I'll be there in ten minutes."

"I won't drive." Dean hung up and let his phone drop into the passenger seat. He felt so numb. His head was swimming. He wanted to feel angry again. He thought of Sam. He mst be with Ellen and Charlie. Jo probably went back home to tell Ash. He felt so worthless. He couldn't help Bobby. How was he gonna help Sam? He'd ran off and gotten shit faced. He'd hung up on his boyfriend. He'd ran away. What the hell was wrong with him.

Dean closed his eyes and the next thing he knew Cas was opening his door. He couldn't look at him. He felt like such a coward.

"Dean..." Cas' voice was soft.

"Yell at me." Dean felt the numbness melt away. He felt the self loathing take over.

"No, come with me."

"Don't be nice to me!" Dean got out of his car. He staggered when he tried to walk aroud Cas. Castiel gripped his arm and made him lean against the side of the car.

"Dean, please. Let's go home."

"Go home to what?! Sammy is probably pissed. He has a great reason to be. I want you to yell at me. Because that's what I deserve. I deserve to feel this way."

Cas held on to his shoulders, "Why do you think that?"

"I RAN AWAY! I left Sam with Ellen and left to go destroy my liver because I can't handle it! I should've been there with Sam the whole time! I'm his big brother!" Dean was yelling now and he coudn't stop it. He knew Cas didn't deserve that, but it didn't matter right now.

"Dean, Sam understands. He knows you needed to process it before you could help him. Sam loves you and he realizes how hard this is for you."

Dean was just staring at him. He couldn't think of anything else to say. He didn't care what happened at this point.

"Come on. Get in my car." Cas was trying to push Dean in the direction, but Dean was not cooperating.

"Cas, promise me."

"Promise you what, Dean?"

"Promise me that you won't leave me too." Dean was exposing himself in the worst way he could think of right now, but he had no control over his mouth right now.

"Dean... I'm not going anywhere. You're stuck with me. We can get past this. Together."

Dean finally nodded, but he didn't believe him. He felt like he was just trying to get him home. He would go though, only because he coudn't make it home by himself.

"Wait, what about my Baby?" Dean turned back to his door.

"Gabriel will drive her home." Dean looked at him in shock. One becasue he'd called her a girl. He was the first person to accept the fact that she was a real person. Second was that he didn't know Gabe was there. Dean leaned over and kissed him. He saw Cas' nose scrunch up.

"You taste awful." Dean smirked. Gabriel walked over to them and Dean glared at him.

"You hurt my Baby and I will skin you with my teeth." Dean shuffled over to him and poked him in the chest.

Gabriel laughed and moved his sucker around in his mouth, "I will take very good care of it."

"HER. Show her some respect."

He held up his hand in a conceding gesture, "Sorry, her. I will take good care of her." Dean nodded and handed him the keys out of his pocket. Cas took his hand and lead him slowly over to his car. He popped the door open and helped him sit down. Dean looked up at Cas with the most adoring look.

"Thank you." Cas leaned down and took his face into his hands.

"Dean, you're the only person I'd do this for. I'm going to take you home, you're going to get a cold shower and a peanutbutter and jelly sandwich. Then you're going to bed. I will take you to Sam when you wake up."

"Can I use you as the pillow this time?" Dean didn't know why he asked, but it was important to him.

"Yes, Dean. I will be your pillow, but you've got to get that smell off you first." Dean looked down and sighed. He caught a glimpse of his hand.

"Oh, I cut my hand." He put his hand close to Cas' face.

"We will look at that when we get home. Cas shut the door, got in on the other side, and drove to his appartment. He didn't have to look at Dean to know he was crying, because he heard him sniffle every three minutes.

Cas didn't know what to say. He didn't know what he was going to do to help, but he was determined. Dean didn't give up on him when he was lost, so Cas was not going to give up on him. He pulled into his spot and texted Sam that he had Dean and he would bring him home tomorrow. Sam thanked him and told him to take his time. He knew how Dean reacted when John died.

Cas didn't know who John was, but he wasn't going to press now. He got out and helped Dean on his couch. He shut the door and looked at th painting on his wall. The angel in the middle looked trapped. Maybe that's what Dean was feeling like. It's what Cas had felt like.

Cas began the task of getting Dean ready for bed. While he showered he made sure he listened so if Dean fell he'd know. When the shower turned off, he rushed to the bathroom. Dean was covered in goosebumps, but he seemed stable enough to dry himself off. Cas kissed his forehead before he left to make his sandwich. Dean was dressed in his sweats when he sat at his table. He had a blanket wrapped around him. He looked helpless. It was heartbreaking.

Cas watched in silence as he ate and cleaned up after he was done. Dean went to the bed and rolled onto his side with the blanket around his shoulders pulled tight. Dean fell asleep before Cas came to the bed. He layed beside him, just in case he woke up. All of a sudden Dean rolled over and wrapped his arms around him and squeezed tightly. Cas ran his hands through his soft, damp hair. That's how they both fell asleep.


	19. Control Me

Dean was sweating in his sleep. Castiel was terribly hot and wanted to get up, but he knew doing so woud wake Dean. It was almost three in the morning. Castiel knew that Dean was having a nightmare because every so once in a while he would jerk real hard and call out softly. He'd heard Sam's name a few times, so he assumed it involved something bad happening to him. Dean began to thrash then.

"... no.. leave him alone... Sam!... DON'T!" Dean jerked upright and reached out toward the bed post with a terrified expression. He was breathing heavily as he realized it was just a dream. He then turned and looked straight at Castiel.

"He was gonna kill you..."

"What? Who was gonna kill me?" Cas sat up and rubbed Dean's shoulder.

"Sam, but it wasn't really Sam. He had these evil black eyes. It was like he was possesed or something. He was gonna stab you."

"You dreamed Sam was trying to stab me? It was just a dream; it wasn't real." Cas leaned up and kissed him.

Dean searched Cas' face. Like he was memorizing every detail, "I'm not ok. I need you to help me." Dean's voice broke and tears sprung up in Cas' eyes.

"I will help you however I can."

"Anything I need?" Dean inched a little closer.

"Of course." Cas' brow furrowed. Dean had a look in his eye.

"Take control of me."

Castiel was wary, "How?"

"I want you to control me. The way you want to."

Cas shook his head, "Dean, no. You are too emotional-"

"Please. I'm asking nicely."

Cas could do nothing but stare at him. He was conflicted on the inside. His dominant side wanted to take over and do as he asked, but then his new found compassionate side wanted to tell him no, that it wasn't right. At least it wasn't right, right now.

Dean moved to the end of the bed, facing the bathroom door. He was on his knees and took his shirt off. He threw the blanket off the side of the bed and waited.

"Please don't make me beg." Dean's voice was shaking. The tremble in his voice was what the final decisive factor was for Cas.

"Dean," Cas moved behind him and started to take off his own shirt when Dean looked like he was going to say something more, "Did I say you could speak?" Dean shut his mouth quickly. He exhaled heavily. Cas removed his shirt and tossed it aside. Raising up on his knees, so he was taller that Dean he leaned foward and ran his hands down the front of Dean's chest.

Dean moved forward into his hands and Cas quickly brought one hand up to take him by the neck. He forced his jaw up, "Don't move." Cas leaned down and took his earlobe between his teeth. Dean moved anyway, and Cas growled. He tightened his grip and moved around him, to face him, "What did I say?" He pulled him off the bed and Cas kissed him hard once on the mouth and took him to the wall beside his closet. There was a metal bar that looked like a towl rack about half a foot above Dean's head, "Grab it." Cas said after he pushed Dean against the wall with his back facing out.

Dean just stood there. Cas was becoming frustrated. He quickly pulled the sweats Dean had on down right below his ass and smacked it hard. Dean did as he was told. Cas moved to his closet and brought out a black flogger. The tips of the leather were red. Cas looked at the fresh handprint on Dean's ass and loved the sight. He'd wanted to do that for a long time. Castiel ran the leather strips down the center of Dean's back. Little goosebumps rose where the leather had been.

"Cas." Dean didn't have to ask. Cas pulled back and hit Dean right in the small of his back. Not very hard, but hard enough to leave tiny red dots where the tips had made contact. Dean groaned and arched into the wall.

"That was for moving." He ran the flogger across his shouders, and watched as the muscles bunched up. He swung again a little harder this time and hit square across his shouder blades, "That was for not listening. Now turn around. Keep your arms up." Dean turned and looked Cas in the eye. His eyes were heated and he licked his bottom lip. Cas felt himself harden and he wanted to bite that lip. Cas looked Dean up and down. The sight of Dean aroused and being good was almost overwhelming. Cas moved foward and flattened himself against Dean.

"You are incredibly hot when you're being good."

"What about when I'm bad?" Dean leaned in against him. Cas moaned at the friction it caused, but he pushed him back because he was in charge right now and he'd just broken the no moving rule again. Cas let the leather strips run over Dean's exposed hard on. Dean shuttered. Cas leaned back to look at him.

"Do you like that?" Cas repeated his action.

"Yes." Dean's cheeks were beginning to get flushed.

Cas quickly struck him with the leather just above his arousal and Dean arched off the wall and squeezed his eyes shut as his mouth fell open. Cas was getting impatient. He wanted to be inside Dean. Cas told him to release the bar and he did. Cas let the flogger hit the floor as he took Dean's face into his hands. He kissed him soundly. He invaded Dean's mouth his tongue and pulled back only to tell Dean to touch him.

Dean's hand went to Cas' back and he was running his hands up and down his spine. Cas bit Dean's bottom lip and pulled. Dean growled and pulled Cas closer. Cas turned them so his back was against the wall and he pulled away from Dean, "Remove my pants off of the both of us." Dean had no trouble doing as he was told. He stepped back and nearly ripped his sweats off. He went to Cas' and went slowly. After his pants were go he went back up to kiss Cas some more. Cas started stroking Dean as the kissed deepened once more. Cas pulled Dean's head to the side so he could slide his teeth across his neck. He bit down and Dean moaned Cas' name.

Cas pulled him back, "My name is Sir. Understand?"

"Yes, Sir." Dean started chewing on his bottom lip as Cas' hands tugged and squeezed at just the right points.

"Blow me." Cas saw the look of hesitation and then a small panic. Dean swallowed twice before he answered.

"Y-yes, Sir." Dean went down to his knees and looked up and Cas. That made Cas harder than the sight of his hand print. Dean took his time deciding what to do. He grabbed Cas at the base and ran his tongue up the underside of his shaft and flicked his tongue against the tip. Cas hissed and closed his eyes. Dean took him into his mouth, careful not to let his teeth drag.

Dean gained more confidence as Cas made sounds and moved against him. He moved his hand with the rhythm of his mouth. He used his tongue against the sensitive tip. That's when he felt Cas put his hand in his hair. He pulled a little, but not enough to hinder Dean's momentum. Suddenly Cas pulled his head back brought him to his feet and pulled him over to the bed.

"You're good at that." His voice was so deep and gutteral that Dean smiled. He was catching his breath when Cas pushed him down on the side of the bed. He bounced up a little from the force. Cas grabbed something from the drawer of the bed side table but stopped when he looked back at Dean. It was a bottle of lube.

Dean knew what Cas was asking with his eyes, "Don't stop." Heat flashed in Cas' blue eyes and he squeezed the cold gel onto his hand. He rubbed himself down Dean couldn't look away. Cas leaned down and go real close in Dean's face.

"Look at me." Dean did, "Wrap your legs around me." Slowly Dean followed the order. Cas bent down to kiss him as Dean felt pressure against him. Cas leaned back to look into his eyes as he pushed into Dean. Both men clamped their teeth together, and Dean's eyes went wide at the feeling. Cas was fully embedded and he kept still as he let Dean adjust to the intrusion.

"Cas.." Dean was trying to moved under him. Cas put his head into the crook of Dean's neck and began to move. Dean was so warm that he wanted to just drill into him. Cas was slowly pulling out and Dean tightened his legs. Cas plunged back in and Dean let out a low moan.

"Does it hurt?" Cas was worried because he knew that this was Dean's fisrt time with a man.

"No." It was a little more than a breath, "Move."

Cas didn't need and more reassurance. He began to thrust a little faster. His breath was picking up speed, along with his heart rate. Cas was losing his control little by little. He was going faster and harder with each thrust. Dean clawed at Cas' back and was making low grunting sounds. Cas bit the muscle at the top of Dean's shoulder and sucked. Cas reached down and stroked Dean as he pulled back and dove back in.

They were both sweating and Cas flet himself getting close. He felt Dean's legs tighten around him, so he knew he was close too, "Dean, say my name."

"Sir?" Dean wasn't really concentrating.

"No my name, Dean." Cas licked up his neck and kissed right at the soft spot behind his ear. Dean arched even more, his legs squeezing tighter, "Not yet. Say my name."

"Castiel!" Dean nearly made Cas deaf with how loud he yelled his name as he came into Cas' hand. Cas' release left spots in his vision. They sat there for a minute or two just breathing harshly and trying to slow their pulses. Cas pulled out slowly and watched Dean's face. He closed his eyes and hummed as he unwrapped his legs. Cas stood straight up and went to get a towel. He wiped Dean's cum off his hand and went over to Dean to clean up his own mess.

After the two had fixed the bed and layed back down. Dean was laying on Cas like Cas had fell asleep on him when they were on the couch a couple days back. Cas thought Dean was asleep and drifting off himself when Dean spoke up.

"Cas?"

"Yes, Dean?"

"I love you." Cas inhaled and held his breath. He ran his hand through Dean's hair and kissed the top of his head.

"I love you too Dean."

"Don't leave me." The desperation in Dean's voice was tearing at his heart.

"I've promised not to ever leave you. I guess I will just have to prove it."


	20. Ellen Wasn't Told

Sam rolled over to the sunlight streaming in from the window. It wasn't fair. He was here to enjoy that beautiful view, but not Bobby. He was gone. He'd never see another sunrise, or sunset. He'd never make another joke at Christmas, or steal all the mashed potatoes at Thanksgiving. Sam rubbed his face. He looked at the clock on his bed side table and it told him it was 11 o'clock. His eyes were puffy from crying and his head hurt. Chalrie had gone home around midnight and Ellen had said she'd stay until Dean got here.

Sam picked up his phone and dialed his brother's number. He had worried about him until Cas texted him last night that he had picked Dean up. The phone rang twice and a man picked up.

"This is Dean Winchester's phone."

"Uhhh, who is this?" Sam was confused.

"This is Gabriel, brother of Castiel." The man on the other end of the line was talking as though he was chewing something.

"I didn't realize Castiel had a brother. Where is MY brother?"

"He's still sleeping."

"How is he?"

"Well, he came here rip roaring drunk. He threatened to skin me with his teeth."

"Did you talk about his car?" Sam half assed smiled at the thought.

"I'm taking it that he often threatens skinning for his car?" Gabriel laughed.

"Yes, he loves that car."

"Do you want me to wake him up?"

Sam contemplated for a minute, "No, that's ok. I was just checking up on him. Whenever he does wake up tell him to give me a call."

"Ok, Not too much trouble."

Sam hung up with Gabriel and pulled on a pair of jogging pants. He went to the kitchen. After making a bowl of Captain Crunch he peeked into the living room. Ellen was on the couch covered by a throw blanket. She had a scrapbook open. He didn't know that anyone in this house had a scrapbook. The book was open to a picture in the middle of a white sheet of paper. It was simple and not very intricate, but it was the most beautiful picture Sam had ever seen. It was of the entire family. Dean had Sam in a headlock and Bobby was holding back Ellen as Jo was trying to stick something in Sam's ear. Ash was standing behind Dean. Everyone looked so lively.

The breath hitched in Sam's chest. He went back to the kitchen to eat his food. This was going to be rough. Dean was taking it the hardest, but Sam felt as though he'd lost his father. Dean though must feel like he's lost two fathers. Sam was too young to really remember much of his biological father. He was nine. Dean had retreated in on himself when John had died, or so Sam had been told by Bobby, who had steped up into the role of "Dad" for the brothers.

Sam hadn't noticed he'd started crying until Ellen made him jump by saying, "Don't cry Sam." He quickly wiped his face and got up to give her a hug.

"How did you sleep?" Sam held on to the only mother he'd known.

Ellen rubbed his back and replied, "As good as I could. Heard anything from Dean?"

"I called him earlier. He was still asleep, so I didn't bother him. He's at Castiel's." Sam pulled away and returned to his cereal.

"I hope he is ok... wait, Castiel as in your boss?" Ellen went to sit across from Sam.

"Uhh... yeah, my boss." Sam looked uncomfortable.

"I didn't realize they were that close." Ellen was curious as to why Sam had started blushing.

"Well, I mean... They are kind of.. a thing. They are together."

Sam winced as Ellen jumped up, scooting the chair back, and slapped the table with both hands, "What?! He didn't tell me he was with anyone. When did Dean become intrerested in men?"

"Honestly, I don't know. This was news to me, too. I found out only yesterday." Sam looked down into his now barren milk.

"I will have to talk with him." She waved her hand through the air as if to dismiss it.

They sat and talked about nonsense until Sam's phone rang, "Hello?"

"Sammy." Dean's voice was rough and a bit hoarse.

"Hey Dean."

"I will be home in the next fifteen minutes. Is Ellen still there?"

"Yeah, do you want to talk to her?" Ellen looked up at him.

"Yeah." Sam passed the phone off and went to dump his bowl.

"We are going to have a nice little sit down, Dean." Ellen said as she brought the phone up to her ear.

Dean groaned on the other side of the phone, "What did I do?"

"You didn't tell me." Ellen smiled and waited for him to understand.

"I didn't tell you wha... uhhhhh. Oh, um, yeah. Damn. Elle-" Ellen effectively cut him off.

"No no, no getting out of this one, Cassanova. We do also need to have a serious talk." She really didn't want to say too much over the phone.

"...Yeah.. I know. I will be home in fifteen."

"Dean, I want to meet him."

"You've already met him." His voice was confused.

"I want to meet him as your boyfriend. I want the formal meet and greet."

"But-"

"Dean, don't argue with me. Do this for me, please."

"Yes, Ma'am."

"Thank you. I will see you soon." They hung up and Ellen laid the phone on the table. Sam was sitting and fidgeting with his hair.

"When you gonna get that cut, Sam?"

"When Dean realizes pie is not one of the major food groups." They both laughed and Sam got up to take a shower. He had a feeling that the next couple of days were going to be rough.


	21. I Want You to Count

Dean was waiting in the driver's side of the impala for Cas to get done with the lock and key gig and to get in. Ellen had said she wanted to meet his boyfriend. Well, she was gonna get her chance. Dean wasn't going anywhere without him right now. He felt like Cas knew that he was using him as his ground point right now, and didn't complain or give an alternative. Dean loved him. Even through all the hurt and anger and sadness that coursed through him, Dean knew that one thing was for sure and it was that he loved Castiel. He knew that Cas loved him as well and that's what he used to get through waking up this morning.

Dean jumped and nearly broke his knee on the steering wheel, he jerked so hard. He hadn't heard Cas get in or shut the door, "Dean?"

"What did you say?" He had been wrapped up in his own head, he hadn't heard him speak either.

"I asked if you were ready." Castiel's eyes grew softer as he wiped away a tear that Dean didn't had escaped. He looked down and nodded. Cas scooted closer and took Dean's hand and placed it over his own heart, "Dean, I want you to try something for me." He just looked up at him and waited, "When you feel like you're slipping, or losing control. I want you to count to three. I want you list three thing that you love. Things that make you happy. They don't have to be big or grand things. It could be that you love apple pie the best." Dean nodded once.

"Can you try it now? Count to three with me."

"One. I like pie."

"Good, keep going."

"Two. I like your messy hair." Cas giggled and nodded in encouragement, "Three. I love AC/DC."

"Good, do you feel better?" Cas ran his hand through Dean's hair. Dean analized himself and found he had actually relaxed in the time it had taken to count to three. His shoulders weren't so tense and he didn't feel so anxious.

"Yes." Dean leaned over to quickly kiss him and he started the car. They took off a little more in control.

* * *

Ellen was sitting with Sam in the living room when she heard Dean pull up. She got up and peeked out the window. He had brought Castiel with him. She supposed she had asked for it. Though, she did think he'd choose another time to do as he was told the first time.

They came through the front door and she hugged Dean. He stepped back after the embrace and looked at Cas, "Ellen, this is my boyfriend. You've met before, but here he is. As the official title calls for." Cas extended his hand, but she ignored it and gave him a hug. At first he was stiff, but he soon recoved and returned the gesture. She whispered in his ear, "I know how to get away with murder, Son. I am also not afraid to go to prison if I get caught, so I suggest you do nothing to break my boy's heart." Cas coughed to cover his laugh as she let go and smiled at him. Dean had gone over to give Sam a hug. She looked at the two and it broke her heart all over again. These two just couldn't catch a break.

Sam sat back down and started flipping through some notes he had out. Dean went to the two man love seat and looked at Cas. Ellen sat back down beside Sam, closest to Dean. Cas took his seat next to Dean and sat back, out of the way. Dean looked at Ellen and she nearly lost her composer. He had so much emotion in his eyes. It was so unlike Dean to show how much pain he was in, but he couldn't hide this. He was leaning forward with his elbows on his knees. They looked at each other in silence for a minute before Dean spoke up.

"I don't want him burned." Ellen shook her head.

"I don't either. I want a close casket funeral. I can't see him like that again." Dean nodded, but didn't say anything, "I was contacted by a lawyer before you got here. There were a few things in his will." Dean started shaking and he was gripping his hands tightly together, "Dean, he left his garage to you." Dean's eyes snapped up to hers and tears started flowing quickly down his face. She watched as he got up and walked into the kitchen. Castiel glaced at he and she nodded. He quickly got up and followed Dean.

She tried to hear what was said, but the only clear things she heard were numbers. One, two, and three specifically. Everything else was garbled. She heard it get quiet and a small kiss sound. At least he had Castiel. They came back out hand in hand and Dean looked a little more in control. Castiel looked proud. She didn't really know Cas all that well, but she loved him for loving her boy. It showed that Dean loved him in the way he leaned on him and kept running his free fingers across their interlaced fingers. It showed in the way Cas was Dean's rock as he leaned into him and how he looked over at him with a look in his eyes.

They all started talking about the rest of the details and by the time they all got finished it was dinner time. Ellen offered to make the food if Dean was willing to do clean up. He agreed and pulled Cas into his bedroom as she got to work. Sammy was still going over notes when they got up.

"Something bothering you?" Cas asked as Dean nearly slammed the door.

Dean was leaning up against the door as he looked up at his boyfriend, "One. I love your blue eyes." There was a pause as Dean thought, "Two. I love the way you fit in jeans." His eyes had traveled down, "Three. I love the feel of you lips." His eyes traveled back up and locked on his target. He took a step forward.

"What are you losing control of?" Cas seemed a little confused. He had been fine since their moment in the kitchen.

"I'm not losing control, I'm gaining it." Dean crossed the space between them and took Cas by the face and kissed him hard. Cas tried to put his hands on Dean's, but he stopped him. He took ahold of his hands and brought them together behind his back. Dean's arms encircled him and Cas was growing frustrated. He was not used to not doing as he pleased. The thought of Dean taking charge heated him up. Dean knew this, but why had he chosen now to do so?

Dean pushed Cas with his body up against the wall, pinning him there. There pelvises pushing together and both feeling the heat of the moment. Dean brought Cas' hands up and pinned them above his head. He brought one of his own hands down and turned Cas' head. He kissed all along his jawline and nibbled on his neck. He went back and invaded his mouth again. Cas pushed against his hold and Dean leaned in harder. Forcing him back into the wall. Cas growled and bit Dean's lip. Dean took Cas by the throat and pulled him off the wall. He let their hands drop and he ushered him to his bed. He let the bed knock his feet out from under him and he repinned Cas' hands above his head.

Their kissing was getting more and more aggressive. Dean reached down with his free hand and ran his hand over Cas' arousal. The friction of the jeans and his hand made Cas arch off the bed. Dean squeezed and heard the suppressed groan.

They both froze as they heard someone come up to the door. There was a second of hesitation before a soft knock sounded and Sam said that dinner would be ready in ten minutes or less. Dean called back that they'd be right out. He looked back down and the pink faced angel underneath him. He smiled a little and kissed him softly.

He got up and pulled Cas up with him. He went to leave and Cas pulled his hand to stop him, "Dean, what was that about? I'm not complaining, but I'm just confused."

Dean looked at him with a straight face, "This was for helping me. I would b losing my shit if you weren't here. You make me feel ok. I'm still fucked up inside, but at least I have you to make sure I don't fall apart. I wanted to thank you." Dean ran his hand down the front of Cas' pants again, feeling the hard on that was still there, " And no matter if you want me to know it or not, I know you like it when I bully you. You aren't used to it, but it gets you going like no other. I thought I'd have more time, but that will just have wait." Cas' eyes flashed the heat he felt in his pants. Dean bit his lower lip and took Cas by the back of the head. The kiss was soft and slow and languid.

After the kiss was over Cas said, "I love you, Dean. We will get through this. And if I have to break that bad habit of stealing my role, I will." They both laughed as they walked back out into the living room to find Jessica and Sam. Jessica was being held by his little brother on the couch and Sam looked up at him. Dean winked and threw him a small thumbs up. Sam smiled and shook his head. Then he kissed the top of Jess' head.

By the time they all sat down to dinner, Jo and William had shown up. Dean looked around and saw everyone taking strength from someone else. Sam had Jess, Jo had William, and Dean had Cas. Everyone, but Ellen, were holding hands. Ellen was sitting quietly. Dean squeezed Cas' hand and let go as he scooted his chair closer to Ellen. He put his arm around his mother figure and kissed her cheek. No on was going to face this alone.

Ellen smiled up at him as she wiped away a tear. She patted his face and told him not to worry. We were all here and everything was going to be ok. He said he knew that, because they all had her. She looked at him with a true maternal love. She held his hand all through dinner. After everyone finished and everyone decided to move to the living room, she excused herself to go sleep. Dean started gathering all the clean up duty materials. He wiped down the counters and gathered all the dishes. Cas was there with him, running water and dumping the reminants left on the plates. They finished quite quickly. Before they walked into the living room to join the rest Dean stopped them.

"Do you mind staying here for the night?"

"I have no problem with that."

"Good, I feel like spending some time with Sam, but I don't want you to leave." Dean looked down and blushed as if embarrassed, "I know I seem clingy, and needy, but..." He couldn't finish his sentence.

"Dean, I said I wasn't leaving. I will need to go to the office, but other than that, I will be right by your side. Maybe you can paint while I'm gone." Cas brushed his cheek with his fingertips.

"That sounds like a good idea." Dean kissed him chastely and pulled them into the living room to join the mindless chatter.


	22. The Case

Dean was laying naked with Castiel in his queen sized bed in is room at home. They had been echanging the dominant role for a couple hours before they had fallen asleep. Dean was wrapped in Cas' arms and uncomfortably hot. They were both sweating and sticking to one another. Dean slowly kicked off his portion of the cover, which was surprisingly small. Cas was definitely a blanket hog. Dean tried to move out of Cas' hold. Cas frowned in his sleep.

Out of nowhere a sudden wave of sadness washed over Dean. He felt his stomach tighten and he gritted his teeth. He had to blink away the stupid tears in his eyes. He had to stop this. He was a grown ass man. Bobby was gone and crying about it was not going to bring him back. He'd probably tell him to dry it up. That he had more important things to worry about, like Sam. Dean thought about his garage. What was he gonna do about it. He knew how to work on cars, but he didn't want to do that for the rest of his life. There was the studio above the shop. Maybe he could turn that into his paint station.

"Dean?" Cas' eyes were still closed, but he wasn't asleep.

"Yeah?"

"You're talking to yourself." Cas opened his eyes just a little.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to wake you up. I need to get some air." Dean attempted to move but Cas stopped him.

"What's wrong? Why are you crying?" He opened his eyes all the way and sat up onto his elbows above him.

"I was just thinking. I'm fine." Dean looked away from those stark blue eyes.

"Dean. I want to tell you something. I don't know... if I can really explain it, but I want to try. I want you to understand why I want to help." Cas sat back, with his back against the wall. He was sitting as straight as possible, like he had a pole strapped to his back. He looked uncomfortable, but determined.

Dean sat up and looked at him warily, "Cas, you don't have to-"

"My father beat me." That shut Dean up, "He was training me. Molding me into the perfect son. He hated me, but he loved me too. He loved me enough to want me to be good, but he hated the fact that I couldn't change." Cas was staring up at the ceiling, looking like he was 15 years in the past. Dean didn't know what to say. John had never beaten him to the extent Cas' father had. The only time he'd been struck was when he lost track of Sammy for an hour.

"Cas.." Dean's voicce broke for him. He pictured a young dark haired boy looking at his father with so much hurt in his eyes, and not understading why. It made him want to kill Cas' father.

"When Gabriel left, I had no one on my side. I have other brothers, but they were his favorites. They looked down on me. They still do." Cas looked straight into Dean's eyes, "I had never known what a family looked like, or more still felt like, until I met you and your family. I know my pain over Bobby's death is nothing compared to yours, but I mourn him too. If only for your sake. He was your real father, in your heart and he loved you. I'm so sorry that you've lost that." Cas moved and wiped the tears that fell from Dean's lashes, and he held his face in his hands, "I was alone until I left. Gabriel found me later, but it was too late. My father had done his damage. Meeting you is the only thing that has allowed me to move on from the emotional road block he put in place." Cas kissed Dean's forehead, "I will never let you feel alone. I will not abandon you."

Dean had no words, just his feelings. He was so choked up all he could do was stare at the beautiful angel in front of him. He felt so helpless, yet he felt like as long as Cas was here, they'd get through anything.

* * *

The next day Cas had to leave for work. Dean and Sam were walking over to Bobby's shop. They had a lot of work to do in the top floor before Dean could work comfortably. Sam was excited to help his older brother. He'd jumped on the opportunity as soon as it had risen.

"So, when you get set up, I thought maybe I could come up here and watch you paint." Sam was looking at the ground and no really making eye contact with Dean.

"Any particular reason? I mean it's not the most exciting thing to watch."

"Well... maybe I could, I dunno... maybe I could get a few tips. Yuknow, like you teach me a few things." Sam had thouroughly blushed and Dean was trying hard not to laugh.

"Well, yeah, but I'd like to know the reason, you're willing to waste time listening to me trash an explination about painting."

Sam just looked at his brother, knowing he was going to make him say it, "It's for Jessica. I want to paint something for her. She loves your paintings... I dunno, I thought maybe.. I want to make her something. Painting seemed like the best option." Sam looked away and muttered.

"Oooooh, look at this, Sam Winchester, a regular cowboy Cassanova. Well, Sammy, I will most definitely help you paint." Sam's eyes lit up, he didn't even give the joke any attention. That made Dean stop and truly assess the situation. He didn't say anything, because he was sure it'd come back up again today. They finally got there and they stared at the empty shop floor. Dean shoulder bumped his brother, "Let's go, we got a lot of work to do if we aree gonna turn you into Picasso." Sam laughed and trudged up the stairs with Dean.

* * *

"I've only been here twenty minutes and there's already a case on my desk." Cas complained to Gabriel, who was standing in his office."

"I mean yeah. That's what happens when you're good at your job. If there's one thing Dad accomplished, it was making you tenacious." Gabe was peeking out the blinds on the window when Castiel knocked his coffee cup off his desk while jumping out of his seat. Gabe turned and looked at his brother questioningly. He looked outraged and in disblief.

"You've got to be dicking with me." Was all he said as he cotinued to look through the case file in his hands. He looked up with rage in his eyes, "Gabriel." That's all he got out before he started shaking.

"Whoa, Bro, what's doing?" Gabe went to the front of the desk and picked up the now empty cup.

"They want me to defend a murderer."

"So? You've done that before. What's the big deal?"

"The man he murdered was Bobby Singer. He murdered Dean's..." He couldn't continue, he didn't have to. Gabe knew how dire the situation was now. Cas was not going to be able to even look at this guy.

"Ok, listen, just go to your boss. Tell them you refuse this case." Cas knew Gabriel was just trying to be reasonable, but his tone annoyed him. How could he be so calm? Gabriel had said he liked Dean. Cas tore out of his office and into his superior's.

"Chuck, I have a problem." Chuck, the senior excutive looked up from his glasses and put his pen down.

"What is the matter Castiel?"

"I cannot work this case." He let the case file drop onto his desk. Chuck could see how physcially shaken Cas was and was confused.

"Why? This isn't any different than the last murder case that you handled."

"The man was murdered was close to me. He was my partner's father. I cannot and will not defend this man."

"Castiel, this is your job. You are a defense attorney. This case was assigned to you. You have to work this case."

Castiel seethed, "I will not. How can you expect me to defend a man I'd like to see strapped to a chair and electricuted?"

"You will work this case or I will suspend you and diliberate with the chairs as to what to do with you. Now please exit my office. I'm sure you have other business to attend to." He picked up his pen again and resumed writing. Cas walked out of the office and back down to his own. He knew wht he was supposed to do, but could he really make a case for this guy who had torn apart a family? His family? He knew that he wasn't really apart of the family, but it was the only family he'd ever call his, aside from Gabriel.

"Hey, whoa. What happened?" Gabe walked up to his little brother, who was having a hard time keeping himself together.

"Either I work the case or he suspends me." Cas was so torn. He needed to talk to Dean.


	23. She Likes Candy

"Whoa... Cas? Hey... no... I can't... Cas, slow down." Dean said as he picked up the phone. Sam looked up from his work space. He had a smudge of blue paint just under his left eye and had green dots all over the hem of his sleeve from where he had tried to spatter the paint. "No, Cas, don't leave. You need to stay at the office. Look, whatever it is we will work it out. It can't be tha-" Dean's face went blank, "They want you to do what?" Sam put his paint brush down as Dean looked his way.

"Dean?" Sam questioned as Dean put his head in his free hand.

"That means Sam too." Dean lifted his head and stared at his little brother, "What would they do if you refused?" Dean shook his head as he listened. "They couldn't find anyone else to do this?" Sam moved over to where Dean was standing and gestured in a 'what' motion with his hands, "No, this is your job. If they're willing to suspend you... I don't like it either Cas... Don't yell at me... Castiel, lower your voice...No... Count, right now. Count to three..." There was a lengthy pause as Castiel gathered himself and counted. "Now, I will see you at your apartment when you get off work. Don't think about it, ok? Do something else for the rest of the day. There will be time to sort through things. Everything will be ok... Yeah..." He hung up and let his head fall back.

"Dean, what's going on?" Sam asked.

"They want him to defend a murder."

"He's done that before, though. Why is it a problem now? And why did my name pop up?"

"Because... the murderer... is the guy..." Dean got choked up a little as he had to tell his little brother that he was going to defend Bobby's killer, " He's the guy who murdered Bobby." Sam's face registured pure shock for a solid minute before rage filled in.

"You're joking. How could they hand him that case? He can't ask for it to be given to someone else? I can't.. No I won't help defend him."

"They've threatened to suspend him if he refuses. He said you didn't have to work on it with him. He understands that would be asking way too much. He's just as upset at this as you are." Dean sat back down on his stool as he looked at his unfinished painting. It was going to be a beach in a pitch black night. Dean really loved working with glow in the dark paints, so all the details won't be able to be seen in the light.

"Can they do that? There has to be another way." Sam was red in the face as he paced back and forth between his own painting and Dean's.

" It doesn't look like it." Dean looked at his little brother, "Let's not worry about it right now," He got up and went over to Sam's painting, "Let's see what we've got." Sam still looked angry, but at least his face was turning back into it's normal shade. The bitch face was in place though.

"Don't judge it too much, Dean. I'm trying." Sam stood behind his brother as they pondered.

"Uhhhhh, Sam?" Dean cocked his head to the side and tried his very hardest not to laugh, "What exactly is it?" Sam put his hand on his hips.

"Well the big round thing is a Jaw Breaker. That's why there's a whole bunch of colors... Jess' favorite thing is candy. I want to add like the giant lollipops and maybe some gumballs. Ah hell, Dean, I don't know." Sam threw his hands in the air.

"No! Now I know what it is, I see it. This definitely will go somewhere. Try this..." Dean started giving little tips and pointers as Sam picked his brush back up. He knew that he was just distracting himself for the time being. Inside he was raging at th ijust done to his family. Someone was going to catch hell for this.

* * *

Sam was just finishing the last touches on his painting when Dean stood up and cracked his back. It wasn't very big, and there were a few mistakes that he saw, but he had done it. It was his own work and it looked good to him. He was certain Jess was going to love it. She was just that kind of person.

"You lover her, don't you." Dean smiled over at him.

"What?" Sam kinda laughed as he adjusted his face. He had probably been openly staring into space at his painting with a dumb look.

"Jessica. You love her. It's written all over you, Bro. You were most definitely thinking of her just now."

"What are you talking about, Dean?" He tried to play it off.

"Oh c'mon. You had that smirk and that look in your eye. You were thinking how much she's going to love that painting." Dean raised his eyebrows in a 'tell me I'm wrong' way.

"How'd you know? Since when are you so 'in-tune' with love?" Sam shook his head.

"I'm the love Doctor, Sammy. I know all about these kinds of things." Dean shrugged.

"Yeah, ok. So tell me, Mr. Love Doctor, when did you know you were in love with Cas?"

" 'Scuse me?" Dean looked away from Sam. His face was growing hot. He remembered the first time he'd told Cas he loved him in vivid detail. Everything that had happened leading up to the confession and the way they spooned after.

"When did you know for certain?" Sam was curious as to why his big brother had gone red.

"Uh, well... It was the day after we confirmed Bobby's body. The day after you had him come pick my drunk ass up. That was the day I first told him I loved him." Dean scratched the back of his head and turned his body towards his painting so his back was to Sam, so he couldn't see the semi-hard on he had sprung thinking of the memory.

"How did it happen? Was it romantic?" Sam walked up to Dean and looked over his painting.

"Why are you so curious? I'm not romantic, you know that. No chick flick moments." Dean leaned forward and put his elbow on his knee in an attept to further shield Sam.

"There wasn't any lead up? It was just said?" Sam looked over at him in disbelief.

"God damn it Sammy... Yes there was a lead up to it, but fuck if I'm going to tell you the story.

Sam was confused as to why Dean was so avid in his reluctance, " Wha-" Realization came over his face and it dawned on Sam why he was keeping it to himself, " Yeah, You just... let's... yeah.. no.. Let's let it die..." Sam quickly hurried back to his painting and went to clean off his brushes with the brightest blush on his face. Dean laughed a little.

"When a Mommy and a Da-"

"NO! Fuck off... Wait are you the... NO. Shit. Dean, you ass..." Sam leaned down and started banging his head against the counter next to the sink. Dean couldn't help but laugh. It was so great to be able to make his little brother die a little on the inside.

Dean looked at the time on his phone. He had thirty minutes before Cas got off work. "Are you hungry. I still have a little time left." Sam agreed to get food and they packed up the paint and left the canvases to dry. Dean's wasn't done, but it was coming along. They locked up the place and started walking to the Taco Bel around the corner.


	24. Wasted Water

After Dean dropped Sam off at the house he drove over to Cas'. Even though he'd gotten off work fifteen minutes ago, Dean still beat him home. He hoped that he wasn't going to be too upset. This whole situation sucked major balls, but if his job was at stake… hell, if it were Dean in Cas' shoes he'd up and tell them to stick it where the sun don't shine. He couldn't understand why they would make him take the case. Unless they didn't know of his relationship with his family. Does his job even know he's gay?

He pondered all this as he walked up to the apartment and unlocked the door. He tossed his keys on the table and went to the sound system to turn the radio on. He found his old rock station and he began cleaning the apartment. He was trying to keep his mind off of the problem that Cas was going through. He didn't know what to say. Should he tell him to tell him to flat out refuse the case and take the possibility of him getting fired, or tell him that it's just a job. One he signed up to do and needed to see through.

"God, I'm starting to sound like a soccer mom. 'I didn't raise no quitters.'" He said in a high-pitched voice. The radio started playing 'Bringing on the Heartbreak' by Def Leppard. "Oh, now this is what I was waiting for." Dean sang into the end of the broom he had in his hands. About mid song he did a spin move and realized he wasn't alone. He pulled up short and started stuttering, "S-shit. You could make a little more noise next time, Cas. I was… uh... cleaning. Yes, I was trying to clean up a bit." Dean stammered out as he accidently dropped the broom. He stood there and went from putting his hands on his hips to scratching his eyebrow, "How long were you watching me?"

"Since the first chorus hit. I could've watched that all day. You have no rhythm Dean." Cas said with a small smile on his lips. His eyes looked tired and his shoulders slumped a little as he dropped his own keys into the little basket on the table. Cas walked over to the radio to turn it down and little and felt Dean's arms wrap around him and squeeze. They stood like that for a little bit before Cas pulled away and removed his trench coat.

"Uh, does your boss know you're gay?" Dean asked as he pushed his boyfriend onto the couch. He bent down and started untying Cas' shoes.

"I can do that Dean." Dean just looked up and nodded, but proceeded to take his shoes off for him, "I've never came out and told them, so I would suppose not. They've never asked or needed to know. Why do you ask?" Dean shrugged and looked up.

"Do they know you're in a relationship with me?" Cas' eyes squinted as was his habit when he didn't follow a train of thought.

"No. Why?" Dean was a little surprised that Cas hadn't thought that it would make a difference. If they knew he was connected to the family of the murdered man, maybe they wouldn't make him defend him. They'd maybe consider he couldn't be objective in his case. Dean said all that just passed through his mind as he stood Cas up.

"I never actually thought about it. Perhaps it would make a difference. Are you comfortable with me telling my boss? I wouldn't want you to feel embarrassed." Cas looked down as he said this and his voiced deepened as he said the last bit.

Dean grabbed Cas' face gently and titled it up, "I will never feel embarrassed that someone knows I love you. I was hesitant in the past because this was all so new. That's over. This," he caressed his cheek with his thumb, "this is here for the long run. And I dare someone to say something about it, because I am not above going to jail for a night or two." Cas' face was all serious and hard as he took in everything Dean had just said.

Cas brought Dean's mouth to his own. The kiss was hard and hot. Cas was saying he loved him without words. When he pulled back Dean smirked, "Why are you so attractive?" Cas blurted out. It sounded like he thought out loud.

"I blame it on my perky nipples." Cas rolled his eyes upward and chuckled. Dean went into the bathroom and started to run a bath. Cas started to unbutton his shirt, "DO NOT TOUCH ANOTHER BUTTON!" Dean yelled from the bedroom doorway.

"Dean, I can undress myself. I'm a grown man." Dean pushed his hands aside and took over the task of disrobing his grown man.

"I'm going to take care of you. You've had a long day at work and I've painted all day. I want to be productive, so you will put up with this because you have no choice." Dean's voice got gruff as he undid the last button and slid the shirt off of his shoulders. He took his time; feeling the muscles as he went.

He pulled him into the bed room and quickly checked the water level. Cas was standing shirtless in the middle of his bedroom watching as Dean added bubbles to the water. He watched his ass as he bent over to check the water's temperature. He knew what he wanted to do tonight. Dean turned around and caught the hot look Cas was throwing his way and paused a little. He then struck a pose and blew him a kiss.

"For a man who isn't used to being gay, you sure pull it off." Cas murmured.

Dean put on a front of being offended and sassily walked over to where Cas stood and put his hands on his hips. He leaned forward a little and said, "I don't pull it off Sweet cheeks, I kill it." He turned his back snapped his finger over his head in a dramatic flair. Cas chuckled low and pulled him back towards him, trapping his arms behind him.

"I am not the one with sweet cheeks." Cas said as he felt Dean tense up. The hair on the back of Dean's neck stood up as the cold chill crept down his spine. He could feel Cas' breath tickle the side of his throat. Dean tried to pull away but Cas held tight. "I don't think so."

"No, Cas," Dean started but whipped him around and kissed the complaint away. Cas was slowly growing into Dominant mode. He forced Dean's flannel button up down his arms. The t-shirt he was wearing underneath was tighter than normal and was soft. That allowed Cas to feel every dip and curve of Dean's back. Dean again pulled away and tried to tell him something but Cas was not listening.

Finally, Dean was able to get his attention when he pushed Cas away. The confusion on his face made Dean step forward out of concern for his feelings, "Cas, the bathtub is about to spill over." Cas looked over and squinted his eyes. Dean kissed his cheek and ran over to stop the water. The bubbles were high enough to reach Dean's thigh. Dean bent over to let a little water out. When he was finished, he turned back to look at Cas and stopped.

His boyfriend was had his pants down around his knees and was slowly working his erection through the cotton boxers he wore. Dean had to make a choice here. It took him all of two seconds.

"Fuck this bath."


End file.
